Alex Update

For  a promotion gift, Alex got a little book light from my parents. He was thrilled with it. It's just a little light to hook on your book to read at night. I knew he wouldn't use it for reading and was not surprised to find it stashed under his covers when I went to tuck him in at 11:30 at night! I took it away explaining it was too late for "reading" and since he didn't have a book in his bed that he wasn't really reading anyway.

The next day I gave it back and told him after eleven pm was too late for using this light. 

Today he brought down my Kindle and showed me how his light could hook to my Kindle. 

"That's cool Alex. Maybe I can borrow it when I need to read on a late night road trip or something?" and I gave it back to him.

Later he came into my room and told me that I should keep his new little light next to my bed and if he needs it, he knows where it is.

I agreed but thought, how strange? He was so excited for his light. (Not to mention that I can read with my light on any old time. James is gone half the time and when he is home, he can sleep with the light on.) Then I realized that Alex sharing this light, is his way of showing love. He loves me so much that he thinks it's more important to leave his light with me, in the event I need it?

I guess I'll need to start reading in the dark, just so he can see me using this little light.

And while I'm sharing sweet Alex stuff. Last week he wrote in his journal,

"I am grateful for a home that mom gave me because I feel very safe."
Safe is his comfort word.

I guess living in an orphanage would be very unsafe and scary. I forget that sometimes. Safety is important and I've started using this word with explanations as to why we have some of the rules we have. We want to keep him safe. He will nod and grin. He's all about being safe.

 

Rylee was watching some video clips on YouTube and found some Disney music clips in Russian. I asked Alex if he could understand them? Yes, he told me. I asked if they were the same words as they are in English as I would think the words would change so they would rhyme? He got kind of uptight and didn't want to talk about it and I could see his countenance fall. Just the sound of his native language bothers him. I gave him a hug and asked him about it? Yes, he hates the sound of it. I told him he didn't have to listen to Russian anymore but wouldn't he like to remember his language? Wouldn't it be cool to be able to understand two languages? No. He does not want to remember. He just wants to be American. I told him he needs to remember this conversation. That I tried to help him retain his language but he chose not too and when he grows up and asks "Why didn't you help me remember my language" I will remind him about this conversation.

James overheard our conversation and pulled him into the garage for a chat while he worked on a project. He asked Alex about his aversion to his native language. "I just don't want to remember orphanage!" was his answer. Then James shared that he has good and bad memories about his small hometown and rather than think of the bad things when he visits, he tries to remember the good things. He got Alex to think of good things about Ukraine and even the orphanage. The things he could come up with about the orphanage were his friends and that sometimes the orphanage workers let them stay up late and watch movies. (Probably all those horrid rated R movies that now give him nightmares or makes him cringe when something triggers them in his mind....but hey! At least he found joy in staying up late!)
We'll see if this little talk changes his attitude about hearing and or remmebering Ukrainian/Russian.

I've got a new job chart and list of summer rules posted.

I-yi-yi!

Is it already that time of year?

I'm being a stickler about screen time. ONE HOUR a day but you can earn more time, minute for minute but reading, piano practicing and extra chores. 

Today, being the first full day of summer, Alex is already grounded from screens for 24 hours as he watched two hours too much!  (James and I were out on a date and came home to find Alex glued to the MAC watching his animated Chinese cartoons.)

Now, to be fair, I told my children that family screen time does not count as part of their precious screen time. That as long as there were three or more watching the same show/video/computer screen together. It didn't count. My thought is that even if they're not communicating, they're sharing and could later talk about the show or tell jokes from it or what not. That they are at least being together? Alex has a hard time being part of a "group" and I find him often on his own, in his own world. I noticed it at the 6th grade social, when I drive by and see him at recess and the fact that rarely anyone comes over and asks to play makes me thing he's a bit socially introverted. Not to mention, if given a choice of doing anything, he'd sit in front of some screen alone for hours on end. 

The funny thing is he doesn't get mad when he gets grounded. He just agrees to it, not even in a shrug-I-don't-care-manner. Just in a  okay-I-deserved-it manner. And he's not lying to cover up his over indulgence of screen time so that's good too. 

 

We start with his tutor on Monday. A darling girl named Andrea. I'm having Rylee included for thirty minutes or so each day so Alex won't feel like he is completely picked on but she's coming two hours at a time, three times a week. I'm hoping to get him caught up a little more in reading comprehension, sentence structure and retain/brush up on math skills.

Well, like it or not. Here comes summer! Wish me luck.....