The Offical Friend Birthday Party!

It's official....Rylee's birthday is over!
(After a dinner party, cake party and friend party....whew!)
Last night was the friend party at Classic Skating.
Here are a few pictures.....

Rylee, Brach & Soren

Rachel, Katie & Rylee

Opening Presents

The whole group:Katie, Rachel Macie, Maddie, Ashtyn
Nicholas, Brach, Soren, Rylee

And this is a terrible picture because of the smoke machine, but this is Rylee skating with her Dad. I was so glad James came. He probably had more fun then the kids did. You know when you were a kid? And some old guy with some skating skills would be there and you would think. "Eww...who is this old guy?" He is now my husband. (He even worked up a sweat!) Oh, well we love him!

Misc January!

My photogenic brothers Jeff & Arron

Will wonders ever cease? My MOM is taller than someone! (My friend, Alisa!)

Austin in the corner with his coach Rylee serving him a refreshing beverage!

Devree with her homework poster on her head?

James eating scary fish egg sushi!

Yeah, it was so scary, it made him look Asian!

Sidney with Ella's sweater on her head, this is how all fashionable 18 month olds wear dog sweaters these days!

Rylee's hair after Ashytn's Birthday Party!

It was a "fo-hawk" bun sprinkled with glitter!

Kambree at her work (although she smiled, she was not thrilled that I showed up at her place of employment to snap this picture!)

Laundry Day...

I do laundry on Mondays & Thursdays.

I say, that but usually by Wednesday I have the last batch of Monday's laundry folded and put away only to start laundry again the next day. So usually I'm doing laundry most everyday.
However, I'm pretty particular about laundry from the soap and bleach to the sorting and folding. I like it my way (as I'm convinced it is the best way) and I've tried to have my children help and my hubby but....it's just never worked out. (Although my children do bring down their own laundry and can sort like no other. But I'm always on hand for "Does this go in darks or lights?" Just in case there's a doubt.)
I came across this today and although I'm sure it is meant as a sexist joke, it certainly applies to our household!

Rylee's Offical Birthday!

It's official....Rylee is nine!

She elected to have a HUGE Costco Carrot Cake for her birthday. Which we love but not a lot of others love so even though we invited aunts, uncles and cousins....we still have half a cake!!

She already got her big gift (her bike) before James left for work (thinking he would be missing the actual day) but due to James change of schedule he got home the afternoon of her birthday. She was thrilled!

This is "Horton Hears A Who" pop up book. She's been asking for it forever!

Rylee & James (James has his "birth" shirt on-the shirt he wore the day she was born. Don't laugh...I didn't come up with this....he did! He has a shirt for each child and is slowly growing out of them. I asked if he's going to use the shirt he wears to court when we adopt Alex because I want to make sure it's a good shirt. He told me I should get a 2XL. You should see Kambree's its a stripped t-shirt that he can barely get on!)

This is a special doll made by Aunt Debbie and Grandma Nan. Debbie poured the doll and did all the painting and grandma sewed the clothes and dressed her. Rylee of course squealed with delight!

And how do we party?? We play DS. This is Rylee with her cousins. She had asked if she could call and ask Brach to bring his DS. I said no, this is a party. You're not going to sit around and play DS, that is unsocial. So when Brach got here he found her old Gameboy and Tyler observed. Wow! What party animals!
(It didn't help that she got two new DS games!)

Happy Birthday Ry! I love you. You bring such joy and happiness into our lives.

Bad Pregnacy Day?

Adoption is a lot like pregnancy except you don't get to feel the little flutters, movement and outright kicks reminding you that your child is alive and well. Instead you watch for letters, try to make phone calls, pray for him and hope he's okay. Even though you don't have the protruding belly, heartburn and swollen ankles, your thoughts & worry are constantly with him. Is he warm? Does he believe we're coming? Does he still want to come? Is he well? Is he getting enough to eat? Are the other children being nice? Did he get his package? .....
And like pregnancy you have your good days and bad days. Today started out bad. I've been trying to call Alex since Tuesday. I told him via instant messaging when he was with Ivan, I would call on the 27th . In my mind's eye I picture my Alex, standing forlornly in a dark hallway outside the office waiting for my phone call and it never came. Tuesday morning my translator's phone died and I wasn't able to try the orphanage until 8:30 am which is 5:30 pm their time and the phone just rang and rang. Probably out of the office for the day.
This morning I tried again and again I couldn't get my translator. (He had left his phone and computer at a friends. ) Now, I can't make these calls on my own. No one there speaks English and I can say dog, baby, bread and grandma in Ukrainian so that certainly would be an odd conversation.
This comes on the heels of bad news yesterday about our re-finance. (Remember? The funds we need to complete this adoption? Yeah, re-finance not finished-and may not be with this lender!)
While feeling sorry for my situation all around I get a call that I need yet another document re-done and sent to the Ukraine. The Pollyanna part of me thinks, "At least I found out before I overnighted the first set of redone documents" but the grumpy-"pregnant"-feel sorry for myself- part of me, thinks "Why me?" (Mine was the only document that had to be redone-even though we all had completed our documents the same-I'm not even going into it on this post!)
Anyway, I ran to the assessors office, pleaded my case, had my document filled out and re-notarized, ran up to the capital and picked up my last appostilled document and everything is ready for tomorrow's FedEx drop.
I'm reminded of a conversation I had with Rylee a few days ago when she told me she was having a "horrible" day because her good friend can't come to her birthday party and something else was wrong. (I can't remember exactly what is was...is that a sign of dementia?) I, feeling Pollyanna-ish at the time told her at least everyone is alive with no broken bones or pregnant out of wedlock, in a gang, doing drugs or incarcerated. She had to admit that those things would be worse. So, I'm going to give myself the same pep talk! "Self, things could be worse. You could have a document that is harder to fix, or worse, find out about it later when it's too late to fix it, not to mention, it's a good thing Self, you were home and available to run around and get it taken care of. And Self, your re-fiance will get done sooner or later, you're very blessed to know a most wonderful loan officer-that you should have just gone with in the first place! Also Self, when you do call Alex-tomorrow-chances are that he wasn't waiting or worried and you really should stop torturing yourself with visions of what orphan life is like, besides if he was waiting for your call then he'll even be more happier to hear your voice tomorrow and the great news that you have a submission date and a rough estimate of when you'll be there! So Self, knock it off and cheer up!!"

Travel Talk...

So I made the call today to Delta Airlines with just guesstimated dates of travel. I told them May 14th with a return of June 12th. (I can always hope it will be less than a month right?) So round trip without overnight layovers from SLC to Paris to Kiev is roughly $1, 345-$1,375 and one way back home for my Alex is $1,962. Yes, that's right, it will cost more to get him home then to get James and I back and forth. So the sweet Delta agent put me on hold to see if there were any discounts for adoption travel and came back with this option:
The adoption rate for a round trip ticket is........$2,196!!
BUT you can change your dates as needed with no charge. (Where as the other option is a $200 change charge plus the difference in fare) HOWEVER, the other part of Delta's adoption discount is fabulous! They will only charge your child 1/2 the price of whatever ticket price you paid to get over there (be it the regular rate or the adoption rate) to get them home. So, if I elect to go with the original rate, Alex can travel back for 1/2 that rate. Simple math tells me that the original rate even with paying for a date change would be better than the adoption rate for me and make Alex's ticket roughly $680-$690. That is a substantial savings! Thanks Delta!!
Someone told me that flying into JFK as one trip and then flying to Kiev would be cheaper. I ran this through the Delta representative and it would be about $15-$20 dollars cheaper. But it's possible that they would only give Alex the 1/2 rate discount back to JFK and not home to SLC. So I'd probably end up paying much more for his ticket to SLC, canceling out any savings I made by splitting up my flights. Oh...I know I'm losing some of you on this post..it's getting pretty hairy.
ONE OF THE CATCHES of the adoption discount is you have to fly Delta, no connecting flights on France Air or anything. So flying from SLC to Pairs and taking a connection to Kiev on France Air is out. You have to fly into JFK and then on to Kiev and I didn't actually get a quote for that flight now that I think about it. Good gravy....
OF course this is all speculative and my made up dates did involve weekend travel to come home and it is about $30 cheaper to fly out during the week then the weekend. Again, I didn't actually get the quote for the SLC-JFK-Kiev flight. But at least I have an idea of what kind of money we're looking at.
I asked about bags and you get to check two bags under 50 pounds per person for FREE, have one carry on and one personal item. Extra bags are $200 for the first and $350 for the second.(Zikes!) As mentioned we'll have extra bags with the humanitarian donation from our Stake. I guess James will have to only pack ONE bag and bring a bag of socks & underwear for the orphanage? I hope Jen's husband can do the same.
Meanwhile, I had sent an email request to Golden Rule Travel which is a referral I got off of another families blog. They "specialize in international adoption, humanitarian, and missionary travel". I typed in my requested dates and places and apparently a real person is going to get back with me via email or telephone.
I've tried a number of those sites that compare rates and give you the best rate (with the best rate being about $1,150) but most everyone is giving me Delta flights with overnight layovers and I'm thinking the "adoption discount" is not something you can do over the Internet as it took the representative at least 10 minutes to figure it out while I sat on hold. Besides, I'd just like to get there directly without staying the night anywhere else and come home even faster!
I'll let you know what I hear back from Golden Travel. If anyone has any other ideas, suggestions or frequent flier miles they want to part with (I'm kidding) .....let me know!!

**************2:24 pm Update********
Golden Rule Travel just emailed me and for the same guesstimated dates they can fly us from SLC-O'Hara-Kiev for $1180 round trip (no overnight stay) AND Alex's ticket will be about $600 AND changes to the return date are $50 plus any fare increase. (Sweet!)
I have tentative bookings for these tickets and they will hold them up until 14 days before departure. I was told, "For adoption travel to Ukraine, we rely mostly on our humanitarian contract with Lufthansa/United" So I take it were flying United? Then Lufthansa?
Golden Rule asked who my adoption agency was, I told them Adoption Way and they said, "I'm glad to hear that you're with Adoption Way. They have an excellent reputation." (That's always good to hear!) I told this travel agent I'd pass his email along to other families so email me if you'd like it. I think this is who we'll be flying with unless anyone comments and tells me horror stories or experiences. (Please don't be shy.... tell me if you have any!!)
I had a mom call that read my post this morning. She flew Delta and loved the service but said to get your children a ticket before you get there. Decide on their name and purchase them a ticket in their new name because the adoption discount only applies if they have certain seats available and if you wait until everything finalizes in the Ukraine, by the time you book your flight home those seats may not be available. It cost her $2,400 for each child to get them home OR she could have stayed an extra week in the Ukraine to get the 1/2 price rate later.
She also mentioned that the "adoption" fare is a waste of money. (Just like my simple math concluded!) But did speak highly of Delta as far as service.
I also asked her if she had any other tips for our travel and she said when you get into Kiev you have to get through immigration on your own and they're going to ask where you'll be staying. You will not have met the driver or anyone form Adoption Way at this time nor can you as you're behind security. The answer is put the SDA, Kiev on your form. Good thing to know!
Thanks so much! We adoption parents need to stick together. Anyone else out there with suggestions, ideas or warnings?

Another blessing....

So, part of my stress (besides the paper work, the constant worry about Alex, the approval and of course the major cost) is that James works a pretty structured work schedule and he's not been with his company for very long.
I've been just hoping and praying our travel date will coincide with his two weeks off and everything will be smooth and he'll get back in time to start his new shift.
Today, he talked with his boss about our adoption situation and the need to travel to the Ukraine and his boss told him not to worry, that if he needs more time off or needs to get off early, they'll work with us. He can pick up extra day's to make up for missed days or whatever. This comes as an extreme shock as they just seem so hard nosed and straight laced. His boss explained, we're all about family here. We want people to show up to work and work but we're all about family and whatever you need, you just let us know.
I am speechless....what a blessing!

Ode to January!

Twas the month after Christmas,
And all through the house,
Nothing would fit me,
Not even a blouse.

The cookies I'd nibbled,
The chocolate I'd taste
At the holiday parties
Had gone to my waist.


When I got on the scales
There arose such a number!
When I walked to the store
(less a walk than a lumber),

I'd remember the marvellous meals I'd prepared;
The gravies and sauces and beef nicely rared,
The wine and the rum balls, the bread and the cheese
And the way I'd never said, "No thank you, please."


As I dressed myself in my husband's old shirt
And prepared once again to do battle with dirt...
I said to myself, as I only can,
"You can't spend a winter, disguised as a man!"

So, away with the last of the sour cream dip.
Get rid of the fruit cake, every cracker and chip.
Every last bit of food that I like must be banished
Till all the additional ounces have vanished.


I won't have a cookie, not even a lick.
I'll want only to chew on a long celery stick.
I won't have hot biscuits, or corn bread, or pie.
I'll munch on a carrot and quietly cry.


I'm hungry, I'm lonesome, and life is a bore...
But isn't that what January is for?
Unable to giggle, no longer a riot.
Happy New Year to all, and to all a good diet.

I did not write this and don't know who did but it's very true. Due to my extreme anxiety with regards to this adoption I've been feeding my stress with chocolates and cookies so last week the day the SDA opened, I gave up sweets. (In an effort to give up something for something I want more...I know a little psycho.)
I am allowing sweets on Sundays.(Come on, I'm not THAT good!) So yesterday I made a big pan of German Chocolate Brownies and they were wonderful! It was really hard last week, I had a "lack of sugar" headache almost everyday but I did it! This week will be hard because of Rylee's b-day and she wants a Costco carrot cake. Yum. I love Costco cakes and the cream cheese frosting is my fav! I think I'll just cut myself a big piece and put it in the freezer for Sunday! My goal (besides my crazy offering of sacrifice for this adoption to go smoothly) is to lose a few pounds before our trip to the Ukraine and another ten while there. My theory is that I hate beets and that's what borscht is made out of and that's the only Ukrainian food I know. Besides that, I am not very brave at trying new foods so I'm bound to lose weight...right? (Or gain by eating at McDonald's everyday? I know they have a McDonald's!) Anyway, that's my fantasy....come home with my boy and be 2 sizes smaller!

Random Post....

Sunday night. Kids watching TV. Dishwasher running. And I'm doing my favorite thing, reading through blogs of my friends and family.
Tomorrow I'm heading to the appostille office to re-do one document that I'll be sending overnight  to Ukraine on Thursday or Friday along with two other families. I have everything else ready to go. (Three other notarized document's - due to type errors and crossed out notary issues!)
A friend of mine who is also adopting told me her husband views our submission date like getting a wrist band to buy a concert ticket. We've got the neon bracelet that looks exciting and important yet no ticket to get in the door! He's right you know? Until we get approval, we really are just wandering around looking at our paper bracelet or in our case, the highlighted date on the calendar.
Saturday our Stake collected underwear and socks for Jen and I to take to the orphanage. Oh my. I hope we can get it all there. It's amazing how generous people are and how with everyone just bringing a few items pretty soon you have A LOT of items! I'm going to try and bargain with the airlines for an extra bag in the name of humanity aid. Think they'll go for it?
I write to Alex every week. Sometimes more than once and I mail out every Monday but I'm calling him on Tuesday and I'm sure I'll just be repeating anything I would write so I think I'll just call. Besides he owes me....I think I've written him about 12 times to his two!
Crazy busy week ahead of me. With girls in two different plays, kids with two different basketball practices, three dance classes, carpools, Ry's B-day party, basketball games, house showings, listing appointments, appostille drop off, and continuing ed class. Sounds fun doesn't it?
In an effort to improve myself, try new things and do something I've always wanted to do, I'm starting taking a guitar class. After 5 years, it's about time. In my fantasy world, I'll strum the guitar as my children quietly prepare to go to bed and they'll doze off to the sweet sounds of humming and strumming and grow up with tender memories of their mother. I know, you're laughing, and saying "Right!" but I can always have hope can't I? James bought me a guitar years ago when I then fantasied about strumming around the campfire with my young women. I tried to teach myself which was a joke. My problem is my fingers aren't tough so it hurts, and I love to sing so I stop trying to find the notes (besides my fingers are bleeding) and just sit there and sing and hold the guitar as a prop. I'm going with a friend in my ward to be taught by a lady in our Stake who we're paying with brownies and Diet Coke! Now if I could find a voice teacher that would work for that! (Kambree and I aspire to be great vocalist-or at the least-get great parts in our community theater summer productions!)
Adoption Paper Work Info:
If you haven't been to the appostille office yet be sure to get one copy of your passport notarized and apppstilled in addition to your two notarized passports. Do not send the appostilled passport with the dossier. Keep them as you will need them for traveling!

So what does a submission date mean?

It means that roughly 20 working days from our submission date we'll (with any luck) have our paper work approved and our SDA (State Department of Adoptions) date and know when we're traveling. Normally this is 6-8 weeks after approval. That puts us about mid May. :)
So my mind's been going 100 miles an hour since our great news yesterday. And in an effort to remain in motion and because I've got to do SOMETHING I'm thinking I'll research air fare prices.
My friend mentioned on one of the morning shows (I can't remember which one and haven't been able to find any links on any of the sites I've gone to?) that they were talking about adoption grants. I've researched this before but got no where. So if anyone has a fabulous connection or idea or knows if this is worth pursuing, please let me know!
Family News....
Remember how I was complaining a few post back that my children don't say cute funny things like they did when they were toddlers? Last night Austin (my almost 15 year old) asked if when Dad builds his bedroom could he plumb him in a drinking fountain? I'm like, "You're kidding? Right?" Nope, he was perfectly serious. After explaining the need for water access and a drain, both of which are no where near his new bedroom, he's still under the impression that it shouldn't be that hard. I gave up and told him to ask his Dad when he gets home. (I hope I'm around for this conversation!)
Report cards are out! Yikes! (Out of respect for Austin we'll not be discussing his report card but sufficed to say Alex will not be the only one going to school this summer.)
Kambree made honor roll (yes, with four college courses) and Devree got her 2nd 4.0 perfect report card. Yikes! Why "yikes" you ask? Because back when Kambree was a struggling 7th grader I proposed, as an incentive, for honor roll we'd pay $50 and for 4.0's we'd pay $100. (Not thinking ahead and/or realizing how tenacious and conquering Devree is about homework and all things related to school!) Yep, that's right. Devree will probably cost me $400 a year for the next six years.
Last night we hit Office Depot for folders, binders, pencils and yet another special calculator Kambree needs for a math class. Luckily her old calculator will now be passed to Austin. We then hit Big 5 for gym shoes for Austin and we're now officially ready for the new term! Whew...who said public schooling was free?

WE HAVE A SUBMISSION DATE!!

February 11th 2009!!
Now, let me tell you about the MAJOR miracle(s) that got us to this point. (This is a testament that Heavenly Father knows so much better and more than I do and He must have a hand in all of this!)
First off, James had his schedule changed and was only home for a week. He went to work yesterday and apparently there was a mix up and they weren't expecting him. They told him to stay and they'd figure it out in the morning. We were pretty sad about the new schedule change because it had him gone for all the major holidays; Halloween, Thanksgiving & Christmas. However, we're grateful he's still employed with the economy how it is and we just figured we'd roll with it.
This morning he called and said they want him to stay a week and come home for a week (Normally he's gone for two weeks.) and then be back in a week to start his regular two week shift which is now different from the original change they gave him. NOW he'll be home for ALL the major holidays and most the minor ones!
But that's not the miracle part - although a huge blessing! The miracle part is this:
We have to re-do a couple documents (two typo's and an updated employment letter from my accountant based on my 2008 tax returns-which is a mini-miracle because I'm scheduled to do my taxes tomorrow!) overnight them to Ukraine, have them translated and ready before February 11th. Because James is coming home in a week, we'll be able to get to the notary and get our papers off around the 29th or 30th. If he had kept his original shift, its possible we could have made it but it would have been very scary & tight!
Next part of this miracle:
We should travel in roughly mid-May. Which if it all falls into place (and it will, I have no doubt) James is off for two weeks right in the middle of May! (Can you see how this is playing out?)
I have to confess, I was quite disheartened when Jen got her submission date and I didn't. And now I can connect the dots and look back. If I had her submission date, there's NO WAY I could have gotten the documents to Ukraine on time and if we travel too early in May, it will be a major headache with James work. When am I going to learn to breath, relax and trust in the Lord?
So, that's the scoop! We're on our way!

Today's the day?

So today we MIGHT know our submission date!! (Insert the sounds of angels singing the Hallelujah Chorus here!) Once that date is established we travel roughly three months from then! Oh my gosh I am so excited!!
Knowing Ukraine is nine hours ahead of us, I know their business day is over. I'm trying to be patient and wait for Eliana to call me but every time the phone rings my heart jumps into my throat. I told myself to wait until noon and it's 11:12 right now. I'm going crazy.....
Update (3:24 pm)
Well, since it's 12:24 AM in the Ukraine right now it looks like no news today.
Tomorrow is yet another day......

Important Adoption Information!

Jen got a date to submit her dossier. (I don't know why everyone else didn't and I'm just going to remain positive that we'll all have dates in the next day or two!) But this year the SDA will not take anything that has crossed off and re-written information. Make sure you doctor, notary or any document does not have anything scratched out and re-written. Even if they initial the mistake. If not you'll be re-doing and overnight to Ukraine. (Yikes!)
And Yuri says "No matter how perfect your documents are they're bound to find a problem!"
Talked with Eliana and there was a notary translation problem with the rest of our documents that they have taken care of and they should be submitted tomorrow!! Cross your fingers that we won't be too far behind Jen.

Rylee's Pre-Birthday Dinner

Because James is heading back to work early (he's hitch was changed and he was only home a week this time) he's going to miss Rylee's birthday on the 28th. So tonight we went to Olive Garden for her birthday dinner. Shout out to Mike, my sweet cousin Kristy's husband-and manager-who treated us so nicely-your the best! (He might even be able to pull some springs and help us hold our table for our "Forever Waiting" lunches! But no promises!)

Then we went home and gave her her BIG gift!

She looks pretty tough doesn't she?
After riding it around the dining room, she had to take a spin around outside in the dark!

Things I forgot to blog that I don't want to forget...

Halloween

Lex was very excited to go trick or treating. Although we practiced all day he would forget how to say "trick or treat" and would just say "chikin-chikin". When it was finally time to head out he just couldn't stay with the group, he did not just run, he sprinted from house to house saying "chickin-chickin" and then always a "Sank You". James had to come home and grab his bike just to stay up with him running from house to house. At one point he caught his foot on a landscaping brick and fell down flat. James was sure this would slow him down but he jumped right up and ran on to the next house. Later he showed up back at the house with sweaty damp hair and dumped out all his candy to show me his treasures! He was so proud.
Pumpkins
Carving pumpkins was another story. We're very complex pumpkin carvers at our house. (I say we, but truly, it's James-a talent he is passing on to his children.) However, this year James was out hanging siding and the kids were on their own. Lex wanted to make a pumpkin just like one he saw in our scrapbook. Luckily it was a very simple pattern and not one of James intricate time consuming creations. However, it didn't turn out just how he envisioned it and once again, tears of frustration. It would have helped if he could have understood my helpful hints and suggestions but he just forged ahead without any guidance and parts of the pumpkin that should have stayed in tack didn't. Once the tears started I got James in and he patiently helped him salvage his pumpkin. (It's the one on the top, you can't even see the toothpicks holding the broken parts together!) But pumpkin carving wasn't the happy fun time I had imagined.

McDonald's
After going to Bouncing Off The Walls we stopped for lunch. Lex was trying to tell us he wanted to go to McDonald's. We understood it from the get go but we wanted to go through the Arby's drive in for something for me and James and then to McDonald's by our house for Rylee and Lex. Of course we passed a couple of McDonald's on the way and Lex would get very angry thinking we didn't understand. At one point he even drew a picture of a happy meal.Which made us laugh but he didn't find it funny in the least. When we drove in to the Arby's drive through I thought he might actually burst into tears. No matter how much we explained he just couldn't understand. We eventually made it to McDonad's. Much to every one's relief!

James & Lex
During Lex's stay James was hanging siding on our addition. Lex went out with him and helped him measure and hold the siding, he climbed up on the scaffolding and just worked side by side with James. James let him measure and his measurement was off by 1/4 inch and then he came in. James tried to explain it was okay but he just came in. I'm sure he felt badly that he had messed up. He's quite a perfectionist. (Remember the pumpkin?)
While James was trying to sort out his feelings about Lex and his adoption I remember telling him that if ever he wanted a boy under the hood-working side by side with him, this was the boy. James agreed. He was so impressed with Lex's thirst for knowledge. He loved everything electronic and how thing worked. He and James are like peas in a pod in this regard.
I know that once Alex speaks/understands English I will once again become the boring parent. I know for right now I'm the favorite but give him a few months and he'll realize that I'm the routine, get your homework done, take a bath parent and James is the fun, goof off, do slightly dangerous things parent!





Phones
Lex LOVES to talk on the phone. He would call Masha at Jen's house ever chance he could. He then figured out on my cell phone how to call my mom (her picture is by her phone number) and he'd call her and say "Hello"........Alexie....." and then just grin. It got to where he was picking up the home phone and listening in on conversations. Luckily nothing was a work related call but he's defiantly going to learn a little more English before he starts answering the phones.
Grandma
Lex learned quickly that my mom lives just down the street and he would stop daily, ring the bell, she'd open the door, he'd give her a hug and then he'd jump back on his bike. Needles to say, he has my mom wrapped around his finger. Which is a big thing, my mom was terribly concerned about this whole thing. (You know-just over protective like Mom's are!) She loves that she is a "babooska" and I think he loves having one!
Ooh La La
I taughted Lex to use mouse in his hair and he (on his own accord) spray himself quite zelously with James cologne. Then he'd come and show me how good he smelled and I'd say "Ooh La La". He then started saying it himself. He loved to smell "Ooh, La La!"

For My Alex....

KISSES IN THE WIND (The Waiting Child's Lullabye)

I hold you in my heart and touch you in my dreams.
You are here each day with me, at least that's how it seems.

I know you wonder where we are... what's taking us so long.
But remember child, I love you so and God will keep you strong.

Now go outside and feel the breeze and let it touch your skin...
Because tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God hold you in His hand until I can be with you.
I promise you, my darling, I'm doing all that I can do.

Very soon, you'll have a family for real, not just pretend.
But for tonight, just as always, I blow you kisses in the wind.

May God wrap you in His arms and hold you very tight.
And let the angels bring the kisses that I send to you each night.

--- © Pamela Durkota, written for Josh

Fabulous Rumor...??

I almost hate to type this but I heard a fabulous rumor that the SDA is opening on Tuesday, January 20th. (Knock on wood, cross your fingers, tossing salt over my shoulder and all those superstitious things!)

How awesome would that be? Our documents are being translated right now and with any luck they'll be ready on Tuesday. Will they be submitted? Who knows? Maybe we'll just be getting in line to get a number to get a date to submit months from now, THE IMPORTANT thing is that they're open!! Nothing is happening when they're closed so open is FABULOUS!! And since last we heard they were opening sometime in February, opening next week is yet another mini-miracle on the path of this adventure!
I did a little shopping for Alex today. Sears has their winter coats 30% off the clearance price. Making his very stylish and warm winter coat with a fleece zip out liner only $31. I also picked him up a pair of pants and four more shirts. His pile of clothes in the top of Austin's closet is getting bigger! I still need more pants and underclothing but I think the 8 shirts will be enough to get him started. I so remember doing this when I was pregnant, buying things, folding and re-folding and then evidently re-washing as I had them out months before the baby came. The only difference is the size and that skulls and cross bones and gangster writing didn't seem to be such a prevalent theme in the babies clothing as it is in young boys! (And no, I did not buy anything with skulls & crossbones or bling-bling gangster writing! Good grief!!)

Blog Stalking...

I just commented on EVERY single completed adoption blog on the unofficial Save A Child blogspot asking for help with my advice post. I hope they don't think I'm a stalker or anything!
I got a wonderful comment about inviting parents that have completed adoptions to our next "Parents Forever Waiting" lunch and I think that would be fabulous!
If you're a parent that would like to come and share your experience, advice and tips or just come and reassure us that we're going to make it through this, please come!
We meet the third Thursday of each month at one o'clock.
Email me @ richharts@msn.com for location!
We'd love to have you!

Bowling...

We're not the best bowlers but in an attempt to do something that doesn't involve sitting and a screen we went bowling. The fries were yummy, the company was great and the scores were very low!

Why does Austin always look like he's up to no good?

"Dad (after three turns with a zero) teach me how to bowl!"

3rd Lunch & Call For Advice!

Lunch was great today! The best parts was just talking about our children and our upcoming adoptions and not feeling guilty or trying to gauge if others would like you to change the topic and talk about something else because that's all we wanted to do at this lunch! Talk and talk and talk about our upcoming adoptions, heartache, compare notes and share stories.

The other day one of my children remarked to me that all I ever talk about is Ukraine and I'm sure my friends and extending family say or at least think the same. Many of my friends follow my blog so when we're at functions when others ask me questions like, why are you doing this? My lengthy answer my friends could probably repeat verbatim.
It's funny, before I started this process I felt my life was full, packed with work, family, church etc. Yet this adoption process has filled my life and sometimes I wonder what I'd be doing if I wasn't blogging, reading blogs, or worrying about our adoption. Granted there are others things I SHOULD be doing and many things I COULD be doing but what I WANT to do is surround myself with all things Ukraine. I think it makes feel connected to my little boy.
So lunch was great because all these parents are doing the same thing, worrying, wondering, speculating, and grasping for a connection half way around the world.

These are my NFAA's (New Friends Also Adopting) Carrie & Andreas, Doug & Amy, Carlin, Me, Dave, Lori and her daughter and Leslie. We forgot to get out our camera's until after Jen left. (Sorry we missed you Jen!) and we were missing a couple other Mom's. We'll meet again next month same time same place!

So now, while I wait (for an indefinite amount of time) what do I blog? I've decided to do a research post. I'd like to publish a post to help all of us up and coming parents traveling to the Ukraine. So I'm calling on everyone that has ever traveled abroad, adopted internationally, specifically traveled to  Ukraine for adoption, or if you've come across a tid-bit of information to prepare for your upcoming adventure that you think would be worth passing on. Please comment or email me and share with me any or all of the following:
1. Travel tips
2. Things you did that worked for you
3. Things you wish you would have done differently
4. Things we should know about customs, traditions, manners
5. Things to help our children (both in the Ukraine & at home) through this experience
6. Thing to do, see, and/or buy while we're there!
7. Eating tips or secrets.
8. Anything you'd like to share.
If you don't want to comment on this blog, please email me at richharts@msn.com
all comments and suggestions will be appreciated and I won't disclose your name or anything (unless you want me too!) Thanking you all in advance!

Think "Open-Open-Open"!

Yesterday, I wrote the following update to my post, published it then pulled it off because it was so depressing and I didn't want to depress any one else. I've decided to post it again today as I think we're all feeling the same thing anyway.

2nd Update: So after telling my BFAA Jen about our time frame. And she trying to talk peace and serenity back into my soul, I contemplated. When you're pregnant and you look back the nine+ months seem like a quick (often uncomfortable) blink but when your IN the pregnancy, time stands still and you think you'll be sick and fat and uncomfortable FOREVER!!

I know from my stand point as an adult, that August or September or whenever will eventually get here and we will eventually get to the Ukraine. But, remember when you were little? The start of school year-how long it seemed ahead of you? Waiting for Christmas or vacations? Time goes so much slower when you're a child. I swear it felt like three years in between Christmases. I can't help but think about Lex's point of view. If it's long for me, how much longer is it for him?
I know, I know. He's been in an orphanage for four years now, what's six more months?
It's six months of not being a part of a family, not being here with us, learning English, riding bikes, getting tucked in at night, and getting daily doses of bananas and most importantly... love.
I look at my nephew Brach, who is is eight months younger and it hurts my heart to think of him in an orphanage. That's what is wrong, my heart hurts for Lex. And no matter how prefect my papers are, how quick I collected, how fast I shipped, there is nothing more I can do.
I know about God's time, and my time and about patience and hindsight and all the comforting things people say. Perhaps, some day I'll look back at this post with Lex leaning over my shoulder, and he'll say, "See Mom? We both made it!"
But just for today, I'm going to crack out my chocolates and let my heart hurt....

Yep, that was yesterday. On a happier note, Elliana emailed that all my documents were in order and are going to the Ukraine for translation but then we're still waiting for the SDA to open in February.
I plan on calling Lex the end of the month but I dread his question. "Mama, when are you coming?" I was thinking I'd have some sort of answer or time frame by the end of January. I didn't realize how much I had really counted on getting him this spring. How he would be home with three months of summer to acclimate and learn English before going to school. How I mentally planned summer trips and activities with him in mind. I know I've brought this on myself. No one told me spring, I just got it in my head. It feels like someone just moved my "due date" out three months or more!
As depressing as I sound, I have not given up hope. I know that He is watching over these adoptions or else we wouldn't have made it this far. Who's to say the SDA won't suddenly open and just accept dossiers without submission numbers and dates? What if for 2009 they decide to just let everyone submit without all the  "take a number to get a date to to submit your dossier?" That would cut three months off the time frame!!?
Or else He is going to give me the strength to wait and endure this and some day I'll be able to connect the dots and see why things are like they are and why we had to wait.
Anyway, despite my grumblings, I'm doing better today. Going to focus on good stuff. Thanks for all the encouraging words. Feel free to pray for the SDA to open, I know I and a whole lot of anxious parents will be.

Dose of Reality?

So, I follow a few blogs of families that have already adopted and I happened to glance at the side bar of one of these blogs and actually pay attention to their dates.
Once the SDA was open (apparently in 2008 they stopped taking new dossiers) these were their dates:

02/04 SDA Opened
03/13 We have a submission number
04/15 We have a submission date
05/13 Dossier submitted today
06/10 Notified of August 18th Interview Date with SDA
08/15 Left U.S. for Kiev, Ukraine
AUGUST!! Oh my heck!
I don't know if the SDA is "open" or not but I'll be asking my adoption coordinator today. I'll also be running these dates by them and getting their opinion. I do not believe this family used my adoption coordinator so I'm hoping they have better news for me.
(Note: The big girl part of me says "How could they?" but the optimistic Pollyanna part of me is still holding out for better news!)
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Update: You may wonder why I've posted a picture of See's chocolates?
Because, I have been cramming them in my mouth for the last ten minutes!!
In an effort to not gain 5 pounds in one day I decided rather than stress eat, I'll stress blog!
So, just got an email from the adoption coordinator. (She was incredibly fast, thanks Elliana!) Yep, those dates are about right. They were hoping that SDA would be opening January 15th but now they are saying some time in February. No one knows for sure due to the political unrest over there. The gas war with Russia only adds to the upheaval. So yep, that's what I'm looking at date wise and possibly worse if the SDA doesn't open soon.
Oh, my heck!!! Why did I put the chocolates away?? I'm afraid when I do get over there I may have to pay for two seats on the airplane due to my chocolate-stress eating-that will cause me to have one ginormous butt!
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Our Family Secret....

Psst! I'm going to let you in on a little secret. We try not to let it out but each one of us has special powers and abilities.

Rylee's of course is her enchanting beauty....

And Austin tries to keep it under wraps but, he really is Super Man

Devree doesn't like anyone to know that she is truly Tinkerbell.

And Kambree (needs to wear more clothing) has a hard time disguising the fact that she is Super Girl.

Alex is just your basic Hero.



And, it's true, I am Wonder Woman. (Don't make me get out my lasso of truth!)

But it's no secret, everyone knows that James is Mr. Incredible!

TeeHeeHee...I need to find something better to do!

So, now what?

Now that my paper work is in, how do I feel like I'm moving forward? We all know that I have no control and....I like control.
So in order to feel like I'm making progress, my next project is our bedroom situation! (I say "my project" but truly it's a project for James!) We plan on finishing a bedroom downstairs for Austin and giving Alex his old room. So when James gets home he has such fun in store for him! I can't buy a bed or dresser or do anything until the room is built and we move Austin. Luckily for me, my hubby is incredible talented in this area and we already have all the materials (except carpet) and anticipated doing this, its just a matter of focusing and getting it done!
I actually need TWO beds as Rylee only has a twin and has already voiced her complaint about why does she have the smallest bed? So I need two double or bigger beds and a dresser.
Alex's-soon to be-new room has a chair rail and I think I'll take my 2 extra gallons of green kitchen paint back and have them make it darker and paint the bottom of his room a dark green? Not sure, James hates painting with dark colors and since he is the much better painter, I'll probably have to concede to his idea of paint color.
On another note. Out Stake announced their service project. They're asking the women to bring new underwear, undershirts, and socks for the orphans to the Woman's Conference on the 24th of this month. They're hoping to collect two large duffel bags to send with Jen and I when we go pick up our children. How lucky are we to have such a supportive Stake?
Alex went back to the orphanage today. It was nice to know he was with his half brother, Ivan & Snezhana. It was great to be able to hear from him and see pictures and know he was out of the orphanage. Now I'm back to waiting for him to write letters.
Apparently the 1st package I sent was a hit but most of the toys were stolen by other children. I hope my second package doesn't cause him more problems. I don't think the children will steal the English books but the cars and magic tricks might be hard to hold on too.
I think I'll hold off on packages and just hope I get over there soon and bring him home.

Part Two of Yet Another Happy Day!

So yesterday I was having a nice quiet birthday.
(Well, if you subtract the huge sign on my garage announcing my age!)
I went to The Olive Garden with all my siblings, parents, grandma and aunt.

We had a nice dinner, great conversation, okay food and as mentioned, quiet.
Towards the end of the dinner Jeff need to rush off to catch a flight, Kambree had texted she was heading to friends and my brothers talked of going to a movie so I was planning on a nice quiet night home in my PJ's watching a movie or something. My parents had driven me to the restaurant and were taking me home when suddenly my mom remembered they needed to buy milk and Dad turned the car around and we went to Smiths. I needed milk too so, okay.

Then I came home to (you guessed it!) A SURPRISE PARTY!
Orchestrated by my husband James who's name is now MUD!
And carried out by my friends and family.
(Count on James to throw a party he doesn't have to attend!)
There are many more pictures but not in my camera and I'm afraid they'll be posted on facebook so I'll steal some and add to this post. (NOTE TO ALISA! I have a picture showing that you are shorter than my MOM and I will use it as blackmail if you post unflattering pictures of me on the web!)





And as threatened, here is most everyone! A few friends slipped out early and I think I missed a couple people!

Just having everyone there and knowing how hard everyone worked to make this a surprise was the best present of all. (Especially for James, he has a hard time getting things past his nosy wife!)
One of the highlights of the night was a video my cousin Paul (with the help of my Mom, my sis and Kambree) put together for me. I of course cried-something I'd been trying to avoid-but it was to no avail. It's hard to watch your life flash before your eyes! There were pictures from my birth through my childhood, getting married, (which really made me miss James!) with each of my babies and I cried hardest at the end with pictures of Alex..it was just a happpy-birthday-crying-fest!
Along with funny cards, a beautiful plant, balloon bouquet, suckers that say "40 sucks", hot sauce that says "Still Hot At 40" gift certificates to Desert Star & Bath & Body Works, a beautiful jacket (Thanks Kambree & Devree!), chocolates, new frying pan, lotion set, Willow Tree figuring, and two huge cakes & ice cream, my friends pooled together and got me a gift certificate to a day spa! How did I get such great friends and family?
Here is me blowing out my candles.

Thanks everyone, I know without the help of my girlfriends, Mom and Kambree, James couldn't have pulled this off. And thank you James!I know you felt bad you were not there but, you were there in my heart! 11:11