Language Laughs

This morning it was just Alex and I at breakfast. (The girls were fast asleep as they went to the midnight showing of Eclipse and Austin was at a sleep over.) I made scrambled eggs and Alex wanted to put guacamole on them but couldn not for the life of himself remember how to say it. I can't even attempt to write the words he was coming up with. I finally told him it started with a "g" and he said "Jellybean?" At this point I was laughing and just had to tell him what it was. Guacamole IS a hard word.

Then I asked him to say the prayer. He always prays that James is safe and warm (even when it's 95 degree's outside) and then he prayed that, "No one have any calories." That's a good blessing for those of us dieting but I quickly realized he was praying for no one to have any CAVITY'S. We're going to the dentist today. That's an even better request!

He's off to his tutor-he's taking the short cut and wants to know if we can make a short cut to Brach's house. I can't image how you can make a short cut to Brach's house. He told me we could dig a hole and put in a slide and slide to Brach's house. Oh my. Such an imagination. Of all the inventors he likes (Thomas and Ben) I think he truly idolizes Jimmy Neutron!

Alex's Journal

Alex just didn't have ANY ideas to write about in his journal yesterday. (His life must be so humdrum?) I suggested he write down some of our family rules since he couldn't think of anything else. Here is the entry, in it's entirety:

Here are some family rules.
We cannot steal.
We cannot cheat.
We cannot hit our family.
We cannot swear.
We cannot sneak out like I did one week ago.
We cannot lie.
We need to help each other.
We need to use soap to be clean.
We need to put clean underwear on after we take a bath.

Now, this is the corrected version. A few of my favorite spelling errors from yesterdays entry:
rolse (rules)
nid (need)
halp (help)
ehare (each other)
soup (soap)
arndeware (underwear)

I really loved yesterday's entry as it wasn't the same old thing. The typical entry goes something like this.

I had fun day. My dad is still at work (0r my dad is home or my dad is coming home but usually always something about James and his status of working) My mom made fabulous dinner (or "I am telling you my mom is the best cook ever" or something about me and food). I am writing in my journal (or doing my homework or doing a great job on my homework etc.). I have piano lessons (or scouts or whatever is on the docket for the day.) I went to rehearsals (or the performance) with my mom and my sisters.

Every once in awhile I convince him to write a little about what is truly going on in his life like:

I wiped m face on my T-shirt two times and my mom said "You will do your own laundry next week."

And here's the entry-corrected and with a lot of help with sentence structure-that was hardest for him to write.

I went to a soccer game and after the game I came home at ten o'clock at night and grabbed my scooter and went off to Cody's house without asking. In the morning I talked to my mom about it . Then I got grounded for a week from my friends. I feel unhappy because I don't like to write unhappy thing. Mom and I had long talk and we talked about what could have happened to me. A weird guy could come up and kill me or a policeman could grab me and take me to the police office and they would ask my mom "Do you take good care of him?" and if they did not think she took good care of me I would be put in foster care.

I know that sounds a bit dramatic, but I was being dramatic. I really needed him to understand the severity of sneaking out late at night. We had to talk about what foster care is and how if I was found unfit as a mother they could take away ALL my children. (I also emphasized that this probably wouldn't happen but that it could.)
Yeah, I don't think Alex will be sneaking out anytime soon.

Barooskies (At least that's how they sound!)

I did it! I made barooskies.

They're potato stuffed dumplings. It was a two day affair. Saturday we cooked and mashed the potato's and caramelized the onion. Sunday I made the dough. The recipe called for wheat flour so I ground fresh flour but the dough was so stiff I could hardly roll it out. I remembered we used regular white flour in Ukraine so I did a second batch with white flour. The kids all helped and it took forever!!

You roll the dough in circles, put in the filling, fold and pinch close then drop in boiling salted water. The recipe makes no indication as to how long to cook them so I just had to guess.

Then the were so bland I sautéed them with more onion and butter. The white one's were better than the wheat and Alex loved them!

I served them with a dollop of sour cream. (I tried to make a few with apple pie filling but the dough wouldn't seal and it just made a big sloppy mess!)

Like every Ukraine meal or recipe I've made (Borscht and Poppy Seed Cake) the labor was intensive and the results mediocre at best but the boy below sure enjoyed them.

Really Long Alex Update

Friday while the kids were at camp I had this sudden burst of organizational energy and attacked their rooms. Both children are amazing pack rats and very cluttered. I have many faults but one thing I am not, is a clutter bug. I detest piles and disorganization. Maybe it's a sickness I have? I do realize I have unrealistic expectations from the other humans I live with but regardless-it is who I am. I'm not going to change anytime soon. I've learned to deal with it. That's just the way it is.

However, I do try to be reasonable....

I do give my children creative space and privacy-everyone has ONE drawer for their junk. ONE DRAWER! Not a closet, a dresser and an under the bed. A DRAWER! This is not for toys-there's a toy room downstairs for toys-this is just for stuff or in my mind....crap! They also have a locker on the main floor for coats, books, bags, shoes, cell phones, etc but are required to clean them out weekly. (However, that doesn't always happen-despite the fact it's printed in black and white on the job chart.)

Most my children are good at keeping the exterior of their room up to snuff-Alex included. To look at his room it's pretty tidy, bed made, nothing on the floor. Rylee-like Kambree-on the other hand has a hard time and often her room seems to be spilling out the door.

Rylee's issue is girly stuff. Lip gloss, hair bows, makeup, lotion, powder, barbies etc. It's spread all over her dresser and usually on the floor. She's also terrible about putting her clothes in the hamper. I pulled out too small or worn clothing, limited her dresser display of beautifying girly objects to a framed mirror to hold them, threw out some old school papers, straightened a book shelf, cleaned out the "throw all" top of her closet and wa la-clean tidy room.

Alex's room was another story. (Keep in mind I do this about every three months so it's not like I'm cleaning out a few years of clothes and junk-just a few months!) As mentioned to the untrained eye, it looks pretty tidy BUT in every drawer, on every shelf, under the bed, in the closet was.....JUNK!! Papers, wrappers, broken things, string, batteries, crappy little toys and clothes in every which drawer. No rhyme or reason. No organization. It was inner chaos disguised by outer compliance!

Now, one of my many talks with Alex-probably talk #5, #107 & #290-have been about putting clean clothes in the right place. I've also had plenty of talks about where his junk should go. So I was pretty grumbly while I was cleaning out his room. I cleaned out everything and despite my best intentions of not invading his junk drawer-I had to! Things were spilled and sticking to the bottom-like silly putty and some sort of blue paint. There was so much garbage-wrappers and old school work-I just had to sort through it all. Putting all the things I could tell that were of use in their proper places and organizing-for the tenth time-his clothing drawers. I left the rest-what I would consider GARBAGE-on his bed for him to sort through. (That would be the picture at the top of this post!)

I realize he hasn't had much in his life and that possessions are important to him. I am fine with possession of value. That actually work or that he plays with but this stuff?? Most of it I've never even seen. I also realize that he's creative and what I consider junk could be some part to some invention or creative genius but he MUST realize that his creativity/genius is limited to ONE DRAWER!! (A big drawer at that.)

So, when they got home from camp we went in on the computer and looked at pictures of people's homes with "compulsive hoarding" disorder and I explained that I didn't not want them to turn out that way. They both agreed they did not want to live like that either. Then they both cleaned out their lockers and Alex attacked his pile o'crap. After two hours he came down with a GARBAGE sack of actual garbage! (It took him two hours to sort through his treasures.) He proudly showed me his cleaned out junk drawer-which still has a lot of crazy Alex stuff in it-and then he hugged me and very sincerely said "Thanks mom."

(Sigh)

So much to learn.

Was that lecture #389?

On to #390....

The next night we were eating dinner and I caught Alex wiping his face on the neck of his shirt. Yep, shirt for a napkin. Not cool. I told him to get a paper towel and the next time I catch him doing that he would be doing his own laundry. I know he's done this in the past but I've never been able to actually catch him in the act. (I do however catch him using his hand as a napkin and wiping it on his pants all the time! That's not cool either.)

I bet you can never guess who learned how to run the washer today? Yep, within five minutes he did it again. Blame it on the juicy cantaloupe dripping down his chin or whatever but despite having paper towel in hand he did it again. He's so very quick at this wiping of the face on the shirt that if you blink you might miss it but, I saw it! I witnessed it for the second time in five minutes! So, today he did his own batch of dark clothes, wash, dried and folded. (He's decided that using a napkin might be easier.)

That was what I was hoping.

A week or so ago, during one of our many talks-not exactly sure which one-he broke down crying and told me he's a bad son. That he will never learn and he's no good for our family. I pointed out all the things he does well and then he confessed that he knows mom and dad loves him but his siblings don't. I asked him why he thinks that is? He thinks they don't love him because he cannot remember Russian. I was puzzled by this and assured him that they do love him but that maybe some of the things he does makes it hard to like him? It's true that he annoys them most the time-which is typical for an almost 12 year in general-but he's a little more than typical, he's down right irritating most of the time. I quickly realized that Austin and his friends are always asking him Ukraine words and he can't remember them and he thinks they don't like him because of that. That's not true-it's just that Alex can feel that he annoys his siblings and that's the only thing he can think of that it could be? So, I've decided that this little guy just isn't going to get it on his own. No one is going to teach him if I don't. So it's time to be blunt. To be honest. To help him figure out the dynamics of relationships and social graces.

We talked about how he would feel if I were upset and talking to him for something like, not doing his job and then Rylee butted in with a smug singsong voice saying, "Mom, I did MY job." how would he feel? Bad was his answer. "Well, you do that ALL the time to your siblings." Then later we talked about how he acts like he thinks he knows everything and has done everything. This came from the announcement that can drive a HUGE back hoe. ONCE he drove a small tractor on a farm in Ukraine with his brothers help and now he thinks he can drive EVERYTHING. (He also thinks he can beat up, punch, karate chop or whatever anyone-that he is invincible.) You can see how these things would annoy his older siblings right? Heck! It annoys me. After each of these talks-which I tried to approach honestly but kindly-it was like a little light went off in his head. He had no idea how gloating or boasting could be irritating.

I attribute a lot of this behavior to being raised in an institution where no one thought you were special-where you had to point out your good deeds, draw attention to yourself, point out your special abilities and that you probably imagined yourself much more powerful and invincible then you actually were.

I detest tattling (another huge sibling annoyance issue) but in the orphanage it is smiled upon and encouraged. Who's going to tell him this if his mother doesn't? No one.

I noticed today just how much he's starting to look like a pre-teen and not a little boy. I would like him to stay little longer-I feel like I haven't had enough time and that it will get harder to correct and help him as he gets older and more self conscious. I think some of our issues lately are attributed to hormone's and growing pains and his need to prove his independence from our many rules and regulations. He's just not ready for that-he hasn't proven himself and he doesn't know all he needs to know. I feel like I need to pack in what he missed the first ten years into the next two years. Am I crazy? It seems to me once they're fourteen-right where Devree is this summer-they're done listening, you just hope you taught them well, that they make good choices and be there to pick them up when they fall. (And pray hard for them!)

Last night I went to the airport as one of our families were returning with their two sons from Ukraine. 51 days in Ukraine! Christy you and you're family are amazing and you have kept me so entertained. (I showed up to the airport in Mrs. Darling hair and makeup.) As always, these homecomings make me remember bringing Alex home and just how far we've come.

Despite my many, many lectures (or maybe because of them?) he's come so far. Not just his English but his manners, his attitude, his self image, and the relationships he's working on. He actually wrote in his journal that he's starting to LIKE doing his homework. He's always willing to help and pitch in, he tires so hard, he's the first to get up, get dressed, get his jobs done, he handles being corrected over and over again with the patience of a Saint. He loves his life here and it shows in the twinkle of his eye, his quick smile and contagious laugh.

My cute friend Karen met him today at her son's mission farewell. (Elder Burton...you're going to be a fabulous missionary!) She has followed my blog faithfully and had never met Alex. She was telling him how she knows him through my blog and how I tell everyone what a good boy he is (I do say he's good every once in awhile....right?) and how lucky he is to be a Richhart. Alex was his typical shy self and said very little but afterwards he whispered to me with conviction, "I am Alex Benjamin Richhart and no one can take me!" Yes, I think he's pretty glad to be one of us despite his mothers OCD organization disorder, napkin issues, and my blunt "this is how it is" talks to help him fit in better with his siblings and society.

May he just stay young enough and open minded long enough to get it all!

Fear Factor Camp!

Alex and Ry attended Fear Factor camp this week.

They LOVED it!

They did funny, silly things like eat gummy worms out of pudding, play games, sings songs and they had teams and head bands and they just had a fabulous time.

It was nice as James was gone and I felt like the kids were actually DOING something! As opposed to watching TV or playing video games or me trying to figure out something else for them to do.

Personally, it was nice as I hadn't been able to get up and go to the gym all week due to my Game On Diet and the need to get seven hours of sleep and how late we are getting home with performing Peter Pan. So, I would catch a work out in at the recreational center-where the camp was held-and bring them home afterwards. It worked out fabulously.

So Friday was the field trip. They were seeing the Snakeman. Imagine my surprise when I was briskly walking the track (with occasional burst of running to get my heart rate up) and looked down from the window to see on the grass below, this 110 pound boa constrictor and MY children carrying it!!!

Who needs running to get your heart rate up at that point!

I tried to get pictures on my cell phone but they did not turn out. I did find my camera and get a few pictures when I went down to pick them up. This is Rylee holding "Rosie". (She can not possibly be my daughter-or even less her grandmothers granddaughter!)

Here is Alex holding "Sausage".

Apparently the "Snakeman"-or in this case a woman-brought the snakes to the rec center? They were inthralled and had great plans of getting a snake themselves and having a snake birthday party.

Uhh...no?

Or should I say....NO WAY!

Snakes and birds-I do not do.

Please note-that is NOT my hand petting the boa and I did not touch or come near any of these reptiles. I am just proud of myself for coming through the door and zooming in to take these photo's!

Back Stage Peter Pan Pics!

Cell phone pics we sent to James on opening night:

This one is not from backstage but so great I had to add it. This I stole off of FB and is not even my picture, Devree is the Indian on the right catching all the air.

All four of us back stage night #2

Playing DS through act one!

The Indian Tribe

Chase the Babushka Pirate

Trying to find my feet to put my shoes on under this big dress!

Me as a pirate-note my manly chest hair?

Dev's Saturday Night's War Paint

I think this is from Night #3- The Indian war paint changes each night and so does my facial hair-thanks to Devree-my personal mustache and beard artist!

The Whole Cast!

Only two more nights left! Come see us!

8:00 pm

WVC Cultural Celebration Center

1355 West 3100 South

$5 per person $20 per family!

Quick Post

I got home from my bike ride this morning and started goggling recipes using Swiss Chard. It was in our produce basket this week and I have no idea how to use it. (Suggestions would be appreciated.)

Anyway, I'm sitting here in my bike clothes all sweaty and Alex woke up and came to hug me good morning. I warned him I was sweaty and he said as he hugged me "I don't care. I just want to hug you." Well, if that isn't love what is? (And a darn good English sentence too!)

I need to update more but just don't have time this morning.
Alex and I are planning on making Boruskies-which are sort of like dumplings. Wish me luck. He found the recipe in the Ukraine cookbook I brought home. Luckily he settled on the dumplings instead of the meat-in-jello looking dish.
I'm going to try and take pictures of our dumplings but it may be a two day affair, today we're making the mashed potatoes and caramelizing the onions for the filling. I think I'll do a few with apple filling and put caramel over them for dessert-tomorrow is free day on my diet!!

Peter Pan Pictures!

Me as Mrs. Darling....

And as Jukes the Pirate.....

Rylee the Lost Boy

Kambree the Indian

Devree the Indian

And here's some misc pictures. I am the object of most as apparently Alex really likes taking my picture and a lot of the girls pictures were action and blurry. I'm hoping to get some better posed pictures tonight.

Just Boring Life

Wow, only being on the computer and hour a day has really cut into my blog reading time! I have to pick and choose (I follow a lot of blogs!).
Blogging myself I didn't limit but it seems our lives are so busy yet uneventful I don't know why anyone would like to read about it? But, I have to listen to my own advice. You see, I made Alex write in his journal about being grounded from friends and why. He was not happy about that. He only wants to write about happy things. I pointed out that this is a journal of his life and ten years from now he'll want to remember what his life was really like-not just the glossy happy parts. And besides, I mentioned-how are you going to remember and not sneak out again? Maybe this will help your brain remember? He begrudgingly wrote.
So....in keeping with my own advice....

Busy.

Doesn't seem a big enough, complicated word for this week.
Let's recap the kids:
Kambree fell off Devree's bike last Friday at cracked her rib-or at least that's what we're diagnosing it as. She's been able to dance at rehearsal but is in pain. Today it really hurt and I've got her wrapped and medicated. She needs to heal as she's got drill camp next month.
Austin is running every where and loving having a mom gone every night. The other day I was getting in my locker and noticed sticky drips all down it. What the heck? Austin thought shooting grapes at his sister with his slingshot would be great fun but, not knowing if they really hurt he had his friend shot him first-while standing in front of my locker-and YES they hurt! So, when your friend misses your body and smashes grapes against your mom's locker and you only pick up the smashed grape and don't wipe down the dripping juice-her locker gets sticky and she eventually finds out about your hair brain idea!
Devree has been a trouper at rehearsal and being a nanny for Kammy on Tuesdays. Last night Jazmine showed up-it's the first we've seen her since school let out-and she came to our play and stayed the night. Not sure when she's going home or if she has plans to in the near future but just like a zoo keeper, what's one more animal in this zoo??
Alex is still grounded and spending each night at rehearsal and/or the play. Tuesday night I gave him the camera and he took a bizillion pictures at rehearsal. Unfortunately, the macro setting was on and 85% of them are blurry and unrecognizable. I will try and post the one's that turned out. He is actually loving our play-which I find surprising because I'm pretty tired of it and he's sat through about three rehearsals. He's so dang cute. He comes with us at call time-early and saves seats for whoever is coming that night. Last night he saved seats for Grandma and Grandpa. My mom-who will be coming every night has claimed him for her date each night.
Both Alex and Rylee are at Fear Factor camp and loving it. They play games, eat silly foods and yesterday told me they wished it was all day instead of half a day. I think this time together without friends and/or cousins has really made them closer.
Rylee is just the cutest lost boy. It's so funny to see her with dirt smudges on her face and her hair tucked up in a hat.
Last night after curtain call we went out to the plaza to meet our guests. My Dad was so cute about how wonderful it was to see all of us in a show. Now, my Dad's not a gusher. He comes-sometimes I think begrudgingly-and supports us and tells us good job. But, last night he was genuinely happy and excited about our show!? He thought it was so neat that all four of us were in a show together. I figured he enjoyed this show more than usual as in the past he just watches for the family member he came to see and since there's four of us usually one of us are usually on stage the whole time? I don't know for sure but in all my forty plus years of performing I have never seen my dad that thrilled about a production. Even my girls commented on how happy grandpa was.
We had rehearsal until midnight Tuesday night and I had a film shoot again for my vampire movie Wednesday morning. They wanted to add a couple of scenes so I spent the morning in Provo with bright blue eyeshadow-pinning a flower to my vampire son's horrible 1970's tuxedo. Some day I will be famous you know....with all these crazy film things I do.
We've had some car issues. The van all of a sudden started making terrible noises when you applied the brakes. I took it to my Dad's and he told me I needed to replace my brake pads. But when he pulled the tires, the pads were fine. The lug nuts were lose so he tightened them and the noise is gone. Thank goodness. However, the maintenance required light is on and upon James request I took it to Auto Zone for a diagnostics test and they told me I just need to change the oil. Weird. I really doubt that will make the light go off. The oil is not low-yes a little dirty but really, how is the van going to know it got an oil change? It's not some super cool van with high tech sensors or little robots. It's just a 2000 Honda Odessy. But what do I know??
Austin's muffler is falling off. It's under warranty so we managed to get it to Midas yesterday and are still waiting for the verdict on that. Poor Austin meanwhile is car-less. Oh, whatever will he do?
Well, if you're still with me on this boring post-congrats! I'm going to wrap it up now. Hope everyone has a great Thursday and if you've nothing better to do between now and the 29th, come see our play!

The Game Is On and Alex is in Trouble!

Official first day of Game On Diet!
I grilled chicken and made a grain and veggies casserole, Kam cut up cucumbers and celery and made a big green salad first thing this morning.
I have a huge headache from my sugar withdrawal. I know that's what it is. I've usually had something sugary and yummy by now.
I'm on team #6 (I think we'll be Team Six Pack!) and Kambree on Team #4.
I'm on my 5th glass of water (I need a total of six) and have to keep running to the bathroom.
Exercise is done.
And I did get my seven hours of sleep last night.
In and effort to only be ONE hour on the computer reading blogs I've had to speed read and be real quick about checking my facebook.
We have a dress rehearsal tonight and an interview tomorrow morning in the early AM with Fox 13's Big Buda. Luckily, I'll be dressed as a pirate and I don't think too many people will recognize me. Two more rehearsals and we open! Hurray!!
Alex managed to get in trouble-big trouble Saturday night when he came home from watching a Real soccer game with his friend at ten pm, and took off on his scooter to see if another friend could play.
I know this because I had repeated text from the mom that dropped him off wondering if he was okay, and if he made it home as she witnessed him riding off. (I had left my cell phone home or I would have been a basket case at rehearsal not knowing where he was. Fortunately by the time I read the text I had confirmation that he was safe home in bed.)
Alex thought no one would be the wiser as he told me he wouldn't be home until eleven or eleven thirty. So why not go play and do whatever he wants at ten o'clock at night!!?? Luckily the friend wasn't at home and he eventually came home, found some food, took a bath and went to bed. When he arranged this night we were told he wouldn't be home until eleven or eleven thirty so I didn't worry about making sure Austin was home for him because I'm usually home from rehearsals around eleven.
I even tried to give him an out, like "Were you scared because no one was home?" Nope, he just wanted to go play. He figured I wouldn't know since I wasn't expecting him until later.
Grrr....
He is grounded from friends for the week and going to spend each and every night at rehearsals or the play with me.
How fun for him.
Right now he and Rylee are at Fear Factor Camp-a day camp. (Luckily none of his friends are there or that would make enforcing his punishment difficult.)
Sunday afternoon he laid his head against my shoulder and told me he doesn't think he'll ever learn to obey. It's just not in him...I guess.
I told him then we'll always have this kind of relationship. Me lecturing and him getting in trouble, that I will never throw my hands up in the air and say "Oh well. Alex just can't obey." Kambree backed me up by telling him "Mom will never give up on her kids." (She knows this because I still hound her about cleaning her room-which is her bad habit she's giving up on The Game! Hurray!!) I agreed with her and asked him, "Are you my kid?" To which he smiled and nodded and cuddled against my arm. "Then I'll never give up on you either."
I don't know why he's having such a tough time lately. He's normal tries really hard to be good. (Sigh)
This friend punishment is a tough one as he LOVES playing with his friends. It would have been tougher on me if it weren't for this day camp all week. Thank goodness. (And I didn't even think of it until after I had blurted out his punishment.)
Well, the house is quiet and I need to go find something to eat for meal #3. Two more meals after that and two more glasses of water. I better get them in fast so I don't miss all my cue's in the bathroom at rehearsals tonight!

Happy Father Day James!

Today in church Kambree was asked to give a talk on fathers. She talked about how her dad has taught her how to work and what a hard worker he is. How he works away from home and then comes home and works at home. She never see's him watching sports of TV-sometimes he takes a nap but then just jumps up and gets back to work. The only thing he asks is that the children come talk to him while he's working because he gets lonely and he likes company.
She talked about how he always takes each one of them out to lunch when he's home to spend some one on one time with them and how she likes that.
She told about how he always gives them back to school blessings, and blessings when they're sick.
This talk was all in her own words with no help from me as she composed it thirty minutes before we left for church.
It was very sweet and I just wish that James was there to hear it but he's at work this Fathers Day. Working hard for us.
James, thanks for being such a fabulous dad and great husband.
I love you.

Lecture #375 and counting.....

When I come home with a trunk full of groceries I always honk the horn when I drive in the garage signaling my children to come and help me load them in. Even when I don't honk the horn Alex usually pops his head into the garage and I'm faced with some sort of question or concern before I can get out of the car and shut the door. I've gotten so use to him being right there the minute I get home that when he's not I find it sort of odd.
Today, I honked the horn and no one came running.
Odd.
Devree was with me and we began loading the groceries in. Devree saw Alex at the front door carefully opening it and sneaking out. She went out through the garage and yelled for him to help and he took off on a dead run to his friends house.
Even odder.
Alex is usually very diligent in reporting to me where he's going.
I called the mom of the friend he was heading to and asked her to send him home upon arrival.
About fifteen minutes later he came back and I asked him why he thought I asked for him to come home?
"I no help with groceries?"
Well, yes and that you were sneaking out but mostly because you ran off and didn't tell me where you were going. So now instead of playing you can go pull some weeds in the garden. (I had all the groceries in and mostly put away by this time.)
He went out and started pulling and a few minutes later I went out and started pulling with him and talking about consequences.
I asked him why he would choose to disobey? He usually always gets caught and gets in trouble. Wouldn't it have been better to help with the groceries and then asked to go to his friends? It would have taken less than five minutes but instead he chose to sneak and run off and now his consequence is to be out here in the heat and dirt pulling weeds.
I left him to think about why he would rather disobey then obey and to throw all the weeds in the garbage.
I watched from in the house as he laid his head in his arms and sobbed and then viciously beat the dirt with his shovel.
He came in later-no sign of tears-and I asked if he had an answer for me? He told me his brain only thinks about playing. Wow! I was so impressed he could verbalize this. We talked about how he needs to train his brain to make good choices so he can play more and not get in trouble so often. That only he can figure this out.
He had been invited to go out with his friend tonight and we talked about how making dumb choices like running off and sneaking around could jeopardize doing fun things like that. I told him that behavior like that doesn't make me want to let him do things like that and that he doesn't deserve to go BUT that he can still go tonight if he can promise me that for the next 24 hours I won't have to have any more serious talks with him. That he'll just obey and be good for one day. (Is that asking so much?)
He solemnly nodded and his eyes filled with tears and he walked off.
"Wait, Alex what is wrong?"
"You say I can't go with Tyler, just play at his house."
"What?"
I went back over what I said and he realized he hadn't been listening or didn't understand clearly. (I think he just heard the "you don't deserve to go" and shut the rest off.) We then talked about communication. That it involves not only talking but listening to what the other person is saying. (I find this ironic that within one minute of my deal to not have any more serious talks that I was having yet another one!)
I explained that by communicating we can better understand each other. Instead of walking off crying he could have said "Mom, let me make sure I understand. I CANNOT go with Tyler tonight but I CAN play with him?" Then I could have explained better and we could have avoided all the tears and drama.
He agreed.
I also shared that if he could communicate more information to me like "Mom, I have saved enough money to buy a toy I want at Toys R Us, could you take me there sometime?" that he has a a much better chance of getting me to take him rather than demanding. "I want to go to Toys R Us."
He nodded and you could see the light bulb turn on in his head. (This is a sore spot we have as he's always wanting to "window" shop and asks at the most inopportune moments and last week when the girls were in need of running some errands for things they needed he wanted to go to Toys R Us-which was no where close to where we were-and I said no. I had no idea he had money to buy a certain object-which later turns out that he didn't have enough money anyway.)
Then he confessed to me while out in the garden today he thought I might send him back to Ukraine to the orphanage.
(Ah, that explains the tears and the dirt pounding.)
I asked if he really thought I would do that.
No.
He just thought that maybe I should because he's not a good son.
(Trust me, he's thrown this "I'm not a good son" out before. And I've gone over with him all the things he does well-I think that was just three days ago.)
I told him that no matter what, I am never sending him back to Ukraine. He is our son forever. I do hope that he'll figure out how to train his brain to stop thinking only about playing and make good choices but regardless he's our son and he's here to stay. I don't know why he was born in Ukraine but he was always meant to be with us.
He threw his arms around my neck and then rubbed his cheeks against mine.
That's the best part of all these talks.
The sweet hugs and kisses at the end.
(Sigh)
Can't we just skip to that part and forgo the behavior problems and never ending lectures??
We both agreed we'd be praying for patience with each other and to better communicate. I figure praying is about all we can do now as I'm just really tired of all these lectures and I've run out of ideas and things to say.

Saturday Superstar!

A friend of mine in high school was looking for some actors to help with his film project today. (I know this because we're friends on facebook.) I looked at my Saturday and my clients had just canceled their appointment to look at houses and I figured what the heck? So I sent him a message saying I could help.

As Saturday approached I had so many things I should have been doing, like grocery shopping, cleaning my house, running errands but I'd been messaging back and forth with Kevin and I knew he was counting on me. I figured I'd be one of many extras and he promised it would only be from 10-2.

Friday night I got a message to wear summer clothes and he needed a few kids for an egg toss. I volunteered Alex and Rylee. It just happened to be at the park in our subdivision so we walked over at ten. He handed me the script and low and behold, I was the "star".

Apparently he's competing in the 48 hour film project at seven pm last night he got the topic and the mandatory prop list-an egg. He has to write the script, film it, edit it and return it by seven pm Sunday night.

The story is about investigative report Edna (me) and how she's going to the park to investigate another murder. There's a egg toss at the park as she walk through. She finds a 2nd murder victim clutching an egg and then she runs and everywhere she turns people are eating eggs, hiding Easter eggs, yelling for their kids to eat eggs. In the end she runs into her boss (the murder) who tries to comfort her in her hysteric's and he hugs her but you see him clutching and egg behind her back.

(Insert mysterious scary sound here!)

Had I known I would be running around so much I would have worn gym shoes-as I was in a sundress and flip flops. But it was fun. I got to reminisce with Kevin and another friend from high school, Andy Black-the boss/murder.

And at one point we actually had an older couple stop to see if I needed help-during the discovering the 2nd murder victim scene. Apparently my distress and call for help seemed pretty realistic?

I recruited Brach and Tyler and Traci and her kids to come be in a few shots. (The perks of having the film being shot only a block from your house.)

The premiere is the same night as opening night of Peter Pan. Darn. I would really like to go-or maybe it's best I don't?? There were so many shots of my backside running. Maybe I should just keep a low profile?

If we win (which I'm not thinking is very likely-no offense Kevin) then we get a budget to re-shot the whole thing and make it better and it will go to the Cannes film festival. Who knows? Maybe I'll be the next Napoleon Dynamite? (If I had a font for sarcasm I would have used it on that last sentence.)

Well, all those things I should have been doing instead of making a film are still patiently waiting for me so I better get going.

Wendy & The Real Lost Boy

In the play Peter Pan, there's a song the Lost Boy's sing when Wendy arrives in Neverland. They sing about how she'll sing to them, make them pockets, and tell them stories they've been longing to hear because Wendy's here to stay. Then the chorus goes:
"We have a mother at last we have a mother!"
Rylee has been singing this song over and over and practicing her dance steps in preparation for our play next week.
Today, while walking into the store Alex slipped beside me and he was singing softly "I finally have a mother at last I have a mother."
True, he was probably just imitating Rylee and didn't realize just how sweet and poignant this simple phrase was for me, this Wendy, his mother.
Yep, this little "Lost Boy" has found a mother. Her name just happens to be Wendy too!

By the way we have tickets for sale! $5 for per person or $20 for a family.
Show runs June 23rd-June 29th-excluding Sunday.
Email me at richharts@msn.com for more info!

The letter I am sending off today!

June 16, 2010

Dear Sate of Louisiana,

We are writing regarding the attached Notice of Adjustment letter and check we received from the State of Louisiana in the mail last week.

As we read it, our accountant used the wrong Federal Adjusted Gross Income percentage and we over paid the State of Louisiana $12 for the 2009 year. (See attached #1)

So imagine our surprise when we opened the check-which arrived the same day as the letter-from the State of Louisiana for $1,562! (See attachment #2)

We, of course are more than happy to deposit this check and have many worth while causes that this money can go towards but we sincerely believe this is a mistake and this money is not ours-despite how much we would like for it to be!

We have tried repeatedly to call (225)219-7462-the only number available- to straighten out the situation but it just rings busy. Once we got through to some sort of mail box (mail box #73 if we remember correctly) left our name, number and briefly explained the situation but have not had a return call and that was last week.

We would like to get this straightened out in a timely manner as this check is only valid for 180 days and as mentioned we would love nothing more than to deposit it in our anemic checking account.

We can be reached at....

Sincerely,

James & Wendy Richhart

Late Night Sock In The Eye

Last night I tiptoed into Alex's room to kiss him goodnight. I leaned over his bed to brush his hair off his forehead and POW! He flung out his arm and hit me in the eye and was on the defensive! I don't know if I just touched him at the crucial part of his dream or it's a fight or flight response. I quickly reassured him it was just me, mom coming to kiss him goodnight. He quickly settled and I tucked him in and mentioned that he socked me in the eye. "Sorry mom." he said sleepily.
This morning he asked me if I tucked him in last night.
Yes.
Did I hit you in the eye?
Yes.
I thought you bad guy.
Oh really? Did bad guys wake you up often in the orphanage?
(Yes, I realize that is a leading question but I was squeamishly concerned. If you had seen how quick and defensive he was-you would be too!)
No. But once hobo come in orphanage. Sleep under my bed.
What???
Apparently some homeless man found his way into the orphanage and feel asleep under Alex's bed. He went and got the teacher and the man was escorted out.
Scary.
Gives a new meaning to the character Goldilocks, doesn't it.
Hobo's under your bed?
No wonder I got hit in the eye!

Game On....False Start?

So today was suppose to be the start of GAME ON! Diet. but it's been postponed until next Monday. Boo. This is not good as I've spend the weekend eating terrible in preparation so despite the official game not starting for six more days, Kambree and I are starting today to get conditioned or warm up?
(Did I mention Kambree was doing this with me-her only condition? She DOESN'T want to be on my team! That hurt my feelings for just a minute until I realized that we'll keep each other honest AND I won't have to worry about what she's eating as she's the enemy! She's on the other team! Insert evil laughter here!)
So along with the eating plan, you have to drink 3 liters of water a day, get seven hours of sleep, give up one bad habit and incorporate one good habit. Which has nothing to do with food or diet. (As that is already taken care of in the food plan.) I have decided-after long thought-that my bad habit I am going to work on is surfing the Internet! I gave up TV months ago and instead spend hours mindlessly lurking blogs, reading FB, playing Family Feud on FB etc. So my goal is to only allow myself one hour of social Internet time. This does not include the hours I need to be on the computer for work or the time I spend writing my own blog. Just the time I spend lurking others & socializing. (Which I really don't socialize-I just read about others socializing.)
This seven hours of sleep a night is going to be tricky. Last night we didn't get out of rehearsals until eleven, by the time I dropped everyone off, got home, ordered our Bountiful Basket for Saturday and into bed it was 11:45. My gym appointment is at 5:30 am. I'm not sure how this is going to work. I did sleep until 6:45 and went on a walk but I'm feeling really guilty for ditching Jan this morning. I think until I get this play over with, I'm going to have to skip my early morning gym and just exercise later in the morning? But wow! I feel great having slept for seven hours straight!
Oh, my good habit? I'm going to read my scriptures for ten minutes a day and KNEEL down to say my prayers. (I know, that tells you how lazy I am doesn't it?) I know that's like TWO good habits but I sort of do both already just not as regularly as I'd like. The kneeling down part is strictly laziness on my part-that and my aversion to cold in the winter. But since it's summer-or at least will be some day? It's a good time to start this habit!
Right?
So, I've got my seven hours of sleep, got my exercise in, have started on my water, had my first of five meals-string cheese, banana & six cashews and I have only been lurking blogs for five minutes as I had to check on the Hinkson's and they're adventure in Ukraine.
In the back of my mind, I know this doesn't really count until Monday when the real game starts so I know I'll be tempted to cheat. Blogging it might hold me a little more accountable.
So, faithful readers-the two or three of you out there- feel free in the future to just skip all these entries with the words Game On in the title. As they'll probably be boring and inconsequential and tell you way more than you want to know!
So here's to GAME ON....my false start!

Home again, home again....

Everyone's home and no worse for the wear!

Kam, Aug & Dev had a great time at youth conference. It sounds like they had a very adventurous river run complete with hail, wind and a rescue of a scout troop! Austin is so like his Dad, he's all about adventure. Once while in Lake Powell and a summer storm James had to dive down at night in the water to secure the boat to the buoy. The winds were blowing, the boat was rocking, it was dangerous and James was in heaven! It's all about adventure with my boys!
My girls are not wimps either and both agreed that the river run was the best part of the trip!

James and Alex survived their camping trip in the rain. They rode the motorcycle and climbed cliffs and explored caves-complete with bats. Alex has given me about five hugs since he's been home and told me he missed his house. I know he had a great time with James and his Uncle Bill and cousin Brach but I think he's realizing just how great it is to come home!





Before Alex and James left we had just the two littlest kids and we went out to eat each night. We don't eat out much. We had some free kid meals coupons so it was incredibly cheap. We ate at Texas Road House one night and Wingers another. We also watched movies in the middle of the day, went to the DI, had peaceful quiet Mom School, and Ry and Alex had a bake sale one afternoon and made $13.
Friday morning Alex and James left for their overnight trip and Ry and I cleaned up the house and then went shopping and we shopped ALL day! We went with my sister Kammy, her daughter Sydni and my mom. It was great as there was no one home waiting for us, no responsibility and no time limit! We ate out again on Friday, then Ry and I came home late and popped in a chick flick and put on our pj's and listened to it rain-glad that we were not the one's out in a tent!
Here's a picture of my cute Ry out shopping....

Now the washer and dryer are going full force, Jame is repairing his motorcycle, Ry & Alex have had their baths and are waiting for James and I to watch a movie, Kam is off with friends, Austin with his and Devree is catching up on Facebook on the other computer.
As much as I enjoyed the quiet and the one on one time with my Ry-Pie, it's good to have everyone home, safe and accounted for!