Say Yes

This video is so touching. It brings tears to my eyes.

Another blog that brought tears to my eyes, is this one. So very sad. Please pray for this little guy!
http://oureyesopened.blogspot.com/2011/03/kirills-story.html

Air-born!

 We went to Air-born with our friends the Hinkson's.  Christy and I had a lovely time talking while our children jumped. I'm not sure they even conversed with each other (which was our plan) but they had fun all the same.

Here's Dev....

 Rylee

 Austin

 More Ry

 This is the only picture of Alex that turned out....and even it is questionable.

Remembering....

Wow.

I've been following a few blogs of our families currently in Ukraine adopting and re-reading my posts from two years ago of our adoption experience.

Two years ago today, I sat down with Alex and we went through his cell phone and deleted the half naked women pictures and the pictures of marijuana plants.
I look at him today and can't believe he ever had such things on his phone. Today when we watch movies he'll cover his eyes when a girl is scantly clad and he could be the poster child for the DARE program. He despises cigarettes, drinking and drugs.

Two years ago, I was dying to get him bathed and into clean clothes & hold him in my arms.  Today he baths without prompting, and smells good - at least before he goes out side and captures all the smells of the great outdoors! (I call this "boy/puppy dog" smell. But Austin had the same problem. I think it's just a boy thing?) 

Last night he laid his head in my lap while watching a show and then would take my hand and rub it on his face or his back, prompting me to tickle his back. He LOVES to be touched and loved on. At this age, most boys are pretty opposed to that, I think he's just making up for lost time? 

He still struggles with matching and combing his hair but that's what mom's are for? Right?

Tonight it's just Alex and I home. Austin is out of town, Kambree away at college, Ry & Dev at parties, and James helping out a family member so I think we'll go out to eat. Alex never cares where. Will eat whatever and always says thank you, no matter what it is! He's the perfect dinner companion. 

Happy Friday everyone!

Austin Out The Door!

Austin left this morning on his choir trip to San Francisco. 

He's such a funny boy. He packed his X-box in his carry-on. At first I was "No way!" then when he pointed out that that curfew at the hotel was ten pm, and I- being an experienced mom - realized that there's no way you're getting high school kids to sleep at that time. X-boxing in a hotel room didn't sound so bad! It is way better than: 

a. sneaking out on the town 

b. sneaking into some girls room

c. some girls sneaking into his room

d. any other hooliganistic  activity Austin can come up with on his own!

He packed - you guessed it - gym shorts and white T-shirts. He did bring his tux for performing and his Sunday suit. I asked him what if they go somewhere nice for dinner? 

"Then I'll wear my suit." 

"Well, what if it's just jeans and nice shirt nice?" 

"Mom, if it's nice I'll wear my suit, if not my shorts and t-shirt are fine!" 

*Sigh*

He came up (his room is in the basement) wearing jeans and a nice polo shirt but before he came into my view he loudly announced,

"Mom, don't get all excited. I'm just wearing jeans because all my gym shorts are packed!" 

(Oh, he looked so nice!)

He had to be at the airport at six am. I was trying to get him to pack last minute stuff that he insisted he didn't need, like shampoo?

 Hotel will have it.  

Flip flops? 

No, I'll go barefoot. 

No, you'll wear flip-flops, what if you step on glass? Sunscreen? 

No. 

Yes. (And I tucked into his suitcase. Doubt he'll wear it but at least I tried!)

Hat? 

No we only have lame hats. 

Then I kept asking things like, do you have your contact solution? Toothpaste? Deodorant? Yes, yes, yes. I could tell he was getting exasperated but he's never traveled alone. Not to a real place. Scout camp, yes. But who cares if you don't smell good at scout camp, forget your toothpaste or run out of socks? But he's going far away and I can't run him anything he's forgotten. (Which I tend to do on a regular bases for all my bambinos!) Oh well, it's not like he's going to a rural place or the plains of Africa....right?

I hope he has a great time and that I don't get any calls from the authorities. It's not that he's a bad kid. He's just mischievous. Very mischievous and despite his six foot tall, broad build, he's still a boy. My little boy. 

*Sigh*

No one told me about this part of parenting. I can't help but think, how in the world am I suppose to let him go for two years in two years time? To perhaps some third world country? 

Good grief. 

I know. 

I'm a worrier. 

But I have this superstition that if you worry about something before it  happens then it can't happen? 

I know. 

Sick and wrong? 

The good part about my psychosis is that I realize it's wrong? 

Right? 

That means I'm not that far gone.....right?

Please don't tell me wrong. Then I'll have even more to worry about!!

A couple of Alexims.....

Tuesday I asked Devree how she was feeling when she woke up?

"I have a headache."

When Alex came down I asked the same thing but rather than tell me he had a headache he told me, "My head is bouncing." Which is EXACTLY how one would describe a headache...don't you think?

Last night Austin - being silly - managed to drop his slice of cantaloupe on the floor. Alex quickly proclaimed "Three second minute!" We all looked at him puzzled. "Oh, I mean, three second rule!" 

When reading yesterday I stopped Alex to ask what "I was as nervous as a cat sitting in a vet's waiting room." meant. He had no idea. I asked if he knew what nervous meant?
Yes. Shaky?
Sort of. More like scared. What's a vet?
I don't know.
Do you know what a veterinarian is?
No.
Do you know what a waiting room is?
No.
I told him he needs to stop and ask when he doesn't understand. We continued reading. I stopped him again and again, he had no clue what he was reading. He's a tricky one because he pronounces everything just fine. Hard, long words and you think he's getting it but then when you ask....nope! He's not comprehending. I asked what level this book was? 5.1 (Fifth grade, 1st month)
What? Wasn't your last book 4.2?
Yes.
Why do you have this book?
His eyes fill with tears, "I want to be 5th grade." and then the tears escape down his cheeks. 

Oh baby.....(my heart just hurt for him).

I shared with him about how I just started running in January, training for a 5K and at first how I could only run for TWO minutes before I felt like dying. And slowly week by week I added more running to my time, running for TWO weeks what was suggested in one, and today I'm up to two 12 minute runs. I told him how if I had just started running 3 miles, I would have hated it, my body would have hurt, I would have quit or never tried it again. I also pointed out that there are people my age that run marathons and I can't do that yet. And some run way faster than me and lap me on the track.  Reading is like running. We just keep getting a little bit harder each time and condition our brain to understand the words like I'm conditioning my body to run. That reading something that you don't understand isn't fun and that you don't get anything out of it and it may make you hate reading and want to quit. He seemed okay with my analogy but still so very sad.

Then in a moment of brilliance I told him to think about how he has only been speaking & reading  English for TWENTY TWO months and is currently reading on a 4th grade level but his friends have been speaking & reading English for TWELVE YEARS and they are only on a 6th grade level!! That he should be so very proud of himself! It was like a light went off in his head! He IS doing great! He hugged me and smiled and agreed to turn in his book and bring home a 4.3 level tomorrow.

Whew...

He's feeling so much better and so far (knock on wood) no one else has come down with Strep symptoms. 

In need of three of me!

Alex is a pretty resilient kid. 

He'll fall and bloody his knees and jump up like nothing happened.

He'll wrestle with Austin and be pinned to the ground and I'll yell for Austin to let him up and he'll squeak "No mom. I'm good." 

He's just tough.

But this morning, STREP got the best of him.

Yesterday he was sort of lethargic and complained of a sore throat. I gave him Ibuprofen and he seemed to be okay but not his normal self. At night I could feel his fever coming on and gave him a second dose and he crawled in my lap and let me hold him like the 96 pound almost five foot baby that he's not. But hey! I'll take what I can get.

This morning I came home from the gym at 6:45 to Alex stumbling down the stairs and rushing into my arms telling me "I don't feel well." He was burning up. I dosed him again and he crawled again into my lap and we sat in the dark by the light of the fire and he let me rub his back. He told me he had been sick like this before in Ukraine and had to go to the hospital for 28 days and get a shot each day. I assured him that shots and hospital stays were not in his future, that we would take him to the doctor and he would feel better. He kept moaning and making sad sick noises until the Ibuprofen kicked in then he asked if he could go back to "normal" bed.

Devree came to breakfast complaining of the same symptoms but dressed in her choir dress for festival today. I sent her off to school - hoping we weren't contaminating the entire choir and got Alex up and bathed, the elementary kids dropped off, a call into her choir teacher explaining that I'd be taking Alex in to the Insta-care and if he was positive, I'd be getting Devree from the festival. 

Alex was intrigued by everything at the doctors office. He couldn't hold still during the blood pressure reading so he read really high. His rapid strep culture came back positive so into the car we went to get Devree. We took her back and waited, and waited and hers came back negative. What the heck? They decided to treat her all the same but I took her back to the festival where her group had already started performing but she slipped in between numbers and finished out the performance and the day.

She is now crashed on the couch after taking her antibiotics. Alex came home, took his meds and slept too but woke up with a fever again this afternoon. I just dosed him with Ibuprofen. Rylee needs to get to dance and it's observation so I need to stay and observe, somehow dinner needs to be made before 6:30 because Devree & Austin have a choir performance at 7:00 that I need to be at and yet someone needs to stay with Alex.

Good grief. I need three of me. 

One to be at dance.

One to make dinner.

And one to hold Alex and assure him he will live!

Asparagus Champ??

Last night Austin's friend Noah ate over.

I like Noah.

My first interaction with Noah - about a year ago- was when he came over and asked Austin to introduce me to him. Austin said something like "Uhh...this is my mom?" to which Noah charmingly replied "Oh, well I thought she could be your sister." Since then he's been my favorite friend of Austin's. (I know, he probably didn't mean it and was just trying to butter me up but....it worked!)

So last night we're eating and Noah is telling me that "this is the best asparagus he's ever had" that he's had asparagus before and always thought it was just okay but this asparagus is the best, to which Austin replied nonchalantly,"Yeah, well, my mom's sorta a champ at asparagus." 

Teeheehee....Not only can I lift the crock-pot but I'm a champ at asparagus! 

Two compliments in two days from my two favorite sons!

Who could ask for more??

Conversations & Compliments

A while back I blogged about Alex and his lack of conversation skills. (And my Conversation 101 class?)  I am happy to report that he is really trying. He tends to ask the same thing each morning, but at least he's trying to strike up a conversation? Right?

They usually go like this:

Hi Mom.

Hi Alex.

How your run?

It was good, thank you. How did you sleep Alex?

Good.

But this morning it went like this:

Morning Alex.

Morning Mom.

He comes and lays his head against my shoulder - I am preparing breakfast.

Hows your run?

Oh, I didn't run today. I went to a lift class.

(Not sure he understands what a lift class is, I flex my bicep like a muscular man-that I am not!)

Oh. (He nods) Because you a strong mama!

(Sarcastically) Yes, I am so strong.

Yes, you're so strong you can lift crock pot?

(I can't help but laugh.)

Yes, so I can lift the crock pot.

We do have a rather larger crock pot and apparently that's the biggest, strongest thing he's ever seen me do?

Yesterday, he wrote the sweetest gratitude entry in his journal. (I've let up a bit on his journal writing and he is loving it. No, he still writes 5 times a week but rather than correcting, crossing out, and writing extra sentences for misspelled words,  I am going back through with him at my side and having him correct his mistakes, look up the misspelled words and fixing them himself so that his journal is more legible. I am also giving him more of a break on misspelled words which results in less extra sentence writing. I think it's really helping, at least we don't seem to butt heads so much over it!)

Here is yesterdays gratitude part of his journal entry before corrections:

 I am grateful for my mom because she loves me with all her hart (heart) and she talks (tucks) me in and buys me clothes to where (wear).

Ahh....that's my boy. 

Makes me want to make all my children write gratitude journals.

Is that bad?

Is it an old Irish saying....

Be Careful What You Wish For?

This morning I had signed up to take a short sale class as part of my continuing education for my real estate license. I hate short sales. I think the class was titled "Learning To Love Short Sales." What a crock. Anyway, I was not looking forward to going and IN MY MIND, not out loud or anything, I was thinking "I wish I had a good excuse to skip this class this morning."
But I had nothing. 

Oh dear.
I shouldn't have thought that.

After making this "green" breakfast in honor of St Patrick's day.

(It was Alex's idea....green French Toast and of course green milk!)

Austin left for school and I drove the junior high car pool as Devree has been working on a sculpture all week of some cathedral in Spain for her Spanish class. (I should have taken a picture. Darn!)

I get back home and she calls the home phone with a panic in her voice! "Mom, my geography assignment is due today not my Spanish! I need to make a cake!" 

Keep in mind, Devree is a very "on top of it" student. Often times completing assignments days before they're due, she just got the dates confused. Her plan was to make a cake and pipe the country on in frosting for geography. We had purchased the frosting the night before- thinking it was due on Friday. I asked when geography was and she told me 4th period. I told her not to panic, I'd stick the cake in the oven and come get her.

I go to make the cake and realize I am out of eggs. I went to call my mom for eggs but realized she had borrowed eggs from me last night so I called Amy. Alex ran over and grabbed them from her and I got the cake in and the elementary kids off to school.
Started the Shepard's pie - my pathetic attempt to cooks something Irish in honor of St Patrick's day (It's sort of Irish right? Potatoes? Shepard's? I've tried other Irish dishes with no success and a smelly house for days. Thank you Corn Beef  and Cabbage. So Shepard's pie it is this year!) - while the cake is cooking.

I then realize I can't find my cell phone.

That I didn't hear it ring when Devree called - my kids always call my cell first before they try the home phone. 

It's no where to be found.

I remember setting it on the treadmill at the gym this morning and not remembering anything more. Like putting it in my pocket and bringing it home?

I call Amy....again. (She's often at the Rec. Center picking up swimmers and running them back and forth to school.) She's not there but her son is so she calls him.

Before I hear back from him, Rylee calls and her wire on her braces has popped out. 

Good grief.

I tell her I'll stop by and check it out when I pick up Devree from the Junior High.

Amy calls. Jared found my cell phone. Still sitting on the treadmill where I left it. I have him take it with him to the Junior High and leave it at the front office with my friend Janie as I'm heading there momentarily.

I run up to get Devree - she has my phone - Jared found her. (Thanks Jared!)

We run to the elementary. Rylee has managed to get her wire back into the band and it looks fine. I tell her to hang with it through the day and we'll see if we need to go back to the orthodontist this afternoon.

We go home and I frost the cake while Devree prints out the names of the cities. I glue the names on toothpicks while she pipes on the frosting, make mountains with chocolate chips, sticks in the toothpick signs. As she's putting the finishing touches on it, I attempt to assemble my Shepard's pie and realize that my extra 9x13 is at my mom's house. (Devree is using the other 9x13 for her cake!) I call there and arrange to pick it up on my way home from dropping Devree back to school.  We jump in the car and and get her back in time not only for 4th period but for most of her biology review in 3rd period. (Start to finish cake decorating? 9:10-9:40...thirty minutes! Woot!)

On the way back to school I told Devree it's a good thing this didn't happen two years ago. 

Why?

Two years ago Dad and I were on a airplane going to Ukraine to adopt Alex.

Yep.

TWO YEARS AGO TODAY!

(Can you believe it?)

I stop at my parents and grab my pan and get home and assemble the pie and put my kitchen back together that looks like a whirlwind hit it after our frosting frenzy!

Sufficient to say, I did not make it to  my short sale class.
Top-o-the-morning at our house!
Hope you all have a fabulous St. Paddy's day.
Here's a little something for all of my friends far, far away today!

An Old Irish Blessing

May the road rise up to meet you. May the wind always be at your back. May the sun shine warm upon your face, and rains fall soft upon your fields. And until we meet again, May God hold you in the palm of His hand.

Lessons On Prayer

Monday night, for Family Home Evening, we were talking about prayer. I asked each of my children to share a time when their prayers had been answered. 

Rylee shared a time she had ran home to get a stuffed animal out of the house to show her grandma (we live down the street from my parents) and the house was locked, she was too short to punch in the code for the garage door so she tried to crawl through the dog door but wouldn't fit. She started to cry, then said a prayer and felt inspired to see if the car in the driveway was open. It was and she noticed the remote to the garage and was able to get in through the garage. 

Devree & Austin also shared a story where they prayed to find things and found them. 

Alex shared how one night when he first got home he couldn't sleep. He said a prayer and a voice came to him and told him to calm down, that he was worrying too much about learning English. Then he informs us he was praying in Russian. I asked if God's voice was in Russian? The look on his face of realization was priceless,  YES! God spoke to him in Russian! Then he asked me if God can speak Chinese? I asked him what did he think? 

Yes?

Yes! God speaks and understands all languages and all his children.

The next day Alex asked me if Chinese people pray when they're meditating? I told him it was sort of like a prayer, that they try to relax and feel at peace or to clear their minds and get answers. He informed me that he tried meditating and it didn't work. I asked him what he did?  He demonstrates by  sitting cross legged and places his hands on his knees, with middle and thumbs touching and makes a "Ohmmm" sound. 

(I am trying not to laugh at this point.)

I asked what he was meditating for? 

"To find out who all the kung-fu masters were!"

"And it didn't work?"

"No."

I had to turn away to avoid bursting into laughter!

Winter Camp Try #2!

Alex is off to scout camp!

Winter over night-er.

Brrr...

(So  glad I'm not a boy scout!)

They actually tried this a few weeks ago and the place they went had a "no snow camping" sign posted so here goes try # 2!
(Also, so glad I am not a scout leader!)

The first camp was announced after we left on our cruise and he packed all his own gear as he was leaving before we got home. I made James call and tell him which sleeping bag to take as I was sure he was going to pack the 1.5 pound bag we bought him for Christmas for his summer hiking trips. Not a decent winter sleeping bag. Sure enough, he had the little thin one packed. (Rated to 30 degrees!) 

He kept his bag packed and insisted that he had everything he needed.

Now, I know he forgot PJ's, shampoo & soap last time so I decided at the last minute to check his bag. (And get him to change out of his nice school clothes!) He was a bit disgruntled as he wanted to rush off to his scout leaders house a 1/2 hour early but couldn't because I was making him go through a "mama" check list.

Upon making him change, wear tall wool socks instead of ankle socks, and adding sweats to sleep in, a 2nd pair of wool socks, water bottle, toothbrush and toothpaste to the already "packed and ready to go" bag,  I found he had packed two pair of jeans, two winter hats, one pair of little-tiny-miss-matched stretchy gloves, three pairs of socks, three undershirts, and three long sleeve shirts. Did I mention this was an over-night-er? I repacked, pulling out the unneeded items, insisted on him finding water proof gloves, threw in some fruit snacks crackers and juice boxes.

As I'm adding and subtracting from his bag, his friend Micha comments, "Alex, what would you do without your mom?"

I got a big hug and he was off.

Ten minutes later he comes bursting through the door.

I need a a misskit.

A what?

A misskit!

A biscuit? 

To eat on!! A MISSKIT!! 

(And he pantomimes eating off of plate with a fork!)

Oh.....A MESS KIT?

Alex breaks into a grin when he realizes what he's said.

Which reminds me of this morning.

This morning we were working on reciting his quote for the week. (Each week for school he has to memorize and recite a quote.) This morning I couldn't get him to pronounce worth beans! He was just talking soft, through his nose and "sss-ing" all over. (He has a "s" issue.) 

On the way to school I wished him luck and asked what was wrong this morning?

I just wasn't away-gee.

Away-gee?

Yes, I just wasn't away-gee yet.

Honey, I'm not sure you're AWAKE...now!
 

Again he grins when he realizes his mistake.

Well, I hope my boy doesn't freeze, that he enjoys whatever he gets in his MISSKIT and that he doesn't keep his scout leader AWAYGEE all night!

Alex Update!

Get this!
Yesterday Alex told me at least FIVE times how GLAD he was we took video games away.

He spent his free time driving his remote control car, riding his long board, practicing karate kicks and laying on the ground on his back and then flipping himself up to his feet. (Kambree informed me in dance this is called a Kip Kick. Whatever it is, I couldn't do it so save my life!)

Not sure if he's trying to act happy to appease me or has some alternative motive but he's been sweet and loving and the old Alex I love and remember....

 In Spelling News:

This week Alex has words like

vein

vane

vain

Not too hard to spell but you do need to know how they're being used in the sentence to get the correct spelling. (Homophones.)  I've been reading him the definition and giving him an example of how the word is used and he- in his haste to hurry through his studying - informed me he doesn't need to know the definition, just read the word.
Hum....I argued that he DOES need to know the definition but he was convinced he did not. So, this morning  I scrambled all the words in a different order and he - of course - got a bunch wrong. He was pretty mad about it and informed me that Mr. Allred always reads them in the correct order.
Ah-ha!
So he was just memorizing the order? 

I told him to speak with Mr. A about it, and if he's giving them in order, I will too - for his pre-test tonight. I then called Mr. A (after Alex left for school) and had a chat with him about Alex's opinion that he doesn't need to learn the word - just memorize the order. He was flabbergasted that Alex wouldn't want to learn the definition.
Hello?
Welcome to my world!
The test will be scrambled tomorrow and he'll inform the entire class today.

Oh that was an evil thing  to do wasn't it??

Teeheehee.

Sweaty Mom, Video Games & Lost Spelling Papers

Alex came in and smashed his cheek to mine and wrapped his arm around my shoulder early this morning.

 "Sorry, Alex, I just got back from my run. I'm sort of sweaty"

"That's okay, I like sweaty moms."

"Oh really?"

"Yes, sweaty moms don't smell as bad as sweaty boys!"

If only we could live from this sweet moment to the next sweet moment. 

*Sigh*

But, nope. 

We have real life to deal with. 

Last night, big talk with Dad on Skype about why Alex was in a rush to get home Monday after school, lied to his older sister - telling her that Rylee always leaves school before him (when she's the slowest pokiest) - just so he could rush home to get his homework done and play X-box. Leaving his little sister to walk home in the pouring rain. Alone.

Really this behavior is not like Alex. He is loving and caring but when it comes to video games, another personality takes over. 

So, guess what?

After getting down to the root of why Alex was in a big hurry to get home and would abandon his sister like that, Dad decreed no video games for a month for EVERYONE!!

(His theory....is that in a team, if one person is weak the whole team suffers and they all work on helping the weaker team mate. I agree with this to a point, but because this decree would only effect TWO of our team mates, I can see it driving a wedge between them, not bringing them closer.)

Alex was very brave and told him that it wasn't fair to take them away from Austin. To which Austin agreed. (Keep in mind this is Austin's gaming system and game and he has actually been generous in allowing Alex to play.) Dad called me in for a consult and we've worked out that Alex is to have no video games during the week and limited access on the weekends. 

Whew....

After getting off Skype with Dad, Austin stepped up to the plate and gave advice that only a big brother could give.

"Dude, you need to find another interest. Video games rule your life. Figure something else out."

(Something I've been saying for almost two years!)

We sat around giving him ideas and suggestions.

This morning, before everyone was up and after my "sweaty" hug, guess who was in front of the computer in the kitchen, playing a computer game.

Yep. 

Alex.

Grrr....

I explained that although the word X-box was used, the rule applies to ALL video games and that this rule is indefinite. With no end in sight because it's apparent, he has a big problem.

Later that morning we had time to spare and I  asked Alex to grab his spelling list and we'd do a quick quiz and get some of this afternoons homework out of the way.

Guess who couldn't find his spelling paper?

Alex.

Despite my numerous talks on putting all papers in his folder and where they belong, he has lost his spelling list. Which he had in hand just last night. 

We clean out his folder, throwing away papers that are months old. 

And we talk.

Again.

About organization, follow through and just plain responsibility. 

His face is like stone when I talk with him. Like he's just tolerating me for the moment and not listening to a thing I say. It makes my eyes bulge and it also makes me long winded.

He always agrees, he answers at the right time, I always ask for his input, what he's thinking but he never has anything to say or add. He's like a robot.

I told him that I know he can do this! I reminded him about how he hated his bath and wouldn't use soap and after months of struggling and me making him get back in the tub -sometimes three times - he finally figured it out. Just take a bath and use soap! 

Since then he has learned how nice it is to be clean, to feel fresh, to know he doesn't smell and to not have confrontation with me about his bath.

This organization thing is like that too! His life will be easier when he figures it out!! He's in too much of a hurry so he shoves his papers anywhere he can find and rushes off to play. Video games usually. I told him taking away video games won't change that, he'll be too busy to rush off and do whatever else. That only he can stop, take the time to put things where they go and keep his stuff cleaned up and organized. That one minute yesterday of putting his papers in their right place would have saved ten minutes of him looking, me looking and this talk today!

Again,  he agrees with all of this.

Yet we've had this talk before. 

At least five times before.

He hugs and kisses me before leaving for school and he's off, like everything is hunky-dory. 

Did anything sink in? 

Were my words all in vain? 

Only time will tell.

*Sigh*

With regards to my running? 

I am training for a 5K this spring.

Not a marathon. 

Just a 5K. 

My marathon training?

That is with Alex.

22 months +

Life With Kambree.....

Kambree is home for spring break! 

Love having her home.

Yesterday we went to they gym and worked out then grabbed Rumbi's to-go for lunch. It's great to have her to myself during the day. 

She's been hitting the books hard - apparently spring break is not a break from homework - and this morning I was clearing my Google search bar to look for a recipe for benyas (those donuts looking things from Princess And The Frog) to celebrate Mardi Gras-Mormon style. (With fattening food of course!) and I find this:

How do erythrocytes speed the process of....

(I had backspaced over whatever process she was looking for when I realized I had no idea what this sentence meant. What the heck are erythrocytes?) 

At first glance I thought someone was Googling for the speed of coyotes until I read the sentence closer!

Yep.
That would be Kambree, looking up some medical term for her Human Anatomy class. 

Last time she was home for Christmas break, she was sitting next to my mom examining her hands and pronounces,  "Grandma, you would make a good cadaver!"  She meant it in the kindest way. (If there is a kind way to tell someone that they'd make a good cadaver!) Apparently, my mom has "great veins". My mom - luckily - has a great sense of humor and she tells everyone she knows about Kambree's odd complement. 

She just returned from California before spring break. (Rough life...huh?) Her drill team went to competition there and she had so much fun. Here are some pictures I stole off of FB.....

Yes, she ran into Napoleon Dynamite!

That's my Kam.....

Dev's Before & Afters!

22 months ago....Devree got her braces on! 

Today was the day to liberate her teeth from bondage!

Ta-da!

She joins her older siblings with identical smiles. 

Just think - in this picture alone -  you're looking at $15,000 of orthodontia!

Three down two more to go!

Full or Empty

With regards to yesterdays post, I don't know if any of you out there with Ukraine imports have this issue, but does your child feel extra sorry for him or herself? 

Alex does.

He doesn't even have to write it in his journal. His dejected body language says it all.

"Alex, it's time for reading."

*Sigh"

"Alex it is your turn for dishes."

*Sigh* and head down shuffle into the kitchen.

"Alex it's bath time."

Big *sigh* and begrudging turn off the TV and slouch up to the tub.

He feels like his life is so hard. 

After his journal entry about not getting complimented on his English, I asked him what was wrong?

I have hard life.

What is so hard for you Alex?

He tells me "learning". 

Funny. It's not just learning that gives me the Academy Award winning, speechless performances.

I ask if his chores are hard? 

No. 

Is church hard? 

No. 

Are our family rules hard?

No.

Nothing is hard (as of yesterday) except learning.

Now, I'm a "glass is half full" kind of gal and I struggle with his "glass is half empty" attitude.

I asked him if learning was hard in Ukraine? 

No....because he didn't learn anything. 

(His answer....not mine.) 

We talked about how learning is important and that his life is so much better than so many other children in the world. How he has clean clothes, food, a nice house, toys, a family etc. Then I talk about  how great he is doing and on and on. He agrees with all of that but 

*sigh*

still he feels his life is hard...

 What's a "glass is half full" gal to do?

Alexism

Today in his journal:

I wish someone tell me I got better English.

Bahahaha....

I wonder why no one is telling him he "got" better English?

(In all fairness, I tell him he's amazing...a lot! And we say lot's of good jobs and greats but apparently we don't compliment his English enough?)

For My Friends In Ukraine & Those On The Way

 We have three families in Ukraine right now adopting and a handful more heading there in the next few weeks. It's so exciting to follow their adventures, to see their pictures, get their take on the culture and yet so heart wrenching too. You see, not all children are rip-roaring, ready to go and would go with anyone. Some are scared, afraid to leave all that they know - be it good or bad - move 1/2 way around the world, learn a new language, live a new life and say goodbye to everyone and everything familiar. It would be very scary.
 Alex was one of the first type of kids.
He just wanted out, and he would have gone with anyone.  But not all adoptions go smoothly for various reasons. It's hard to wear your heart on your sleeve and put yourself out there -both financially and emotionally. Adoption is not for the faint of heart and it is by no means....easy!
(In all honesty? I think 9 months of pregnancy and birth was easier than an international adoption. Adoption is not just about the paper work, the extortionate expense, and the trip to Ukraine but the months & months after. The adjusting and acclimation and teaching a child at age ten -without English language skills - without much of an idea what it's like to live in a family - with different cultural values & manners - what you've taught everyone else since birth.)
So, with families gone and families heading I've been reminiscing our experience and realize that I could now talk to Alex and get his take on a few things and hear his side of the story.
I write a lot of sweet things about Alex on my blog. From the get go, Alex has been loving and eager to please. I remember him insisting on carrying in all the groceries during our hosting program, defending my seat next to him when another orphan tried to sit there, jumping up to get my mom a chair and just all over a sweet, pleasing, loving boy.
That's not to say we have don't have moments of frustration, confrontation and a battle of wills. We do. We have (see the first six months of blog entries for further proof) and we will probably have more in the future as he gets older.
We have that with all our children - just because this child was adopted from an orphanage doesn't make him constantly grateful, always obedient nor agree with all our parenting techniques.

But when James and I left for Ukraine, we went to get Alex and Alex alone. We decided that if he didn't want to come or it didn't work out, we were going home.  No question. No looking through books of children and picking someone out, we felt that THIS was the boy for our family. The boy that was meant to be our son.(That's not to say that we disapprove of those that adopt blindly, we just decided it wasn't for us.)  When we got there and he ran into my arms, there was never a question. Yes, he wanted us as much as we wanted him.
Or at least I thought so then.

A few months ago. Maybe almost a year ago, during one of Alex's melt downs, I was asking him if he wanted to be here? With us? And he told me that he would have gone with anyone that came to get him. That anyone would be better than getting hit in the orphanage. 

That set me back. 

Anyone?

We never spoke about it again.

I'm not sure I even blogged about it. 

It sort of hurt my heart but at the same time, I realized just how scary living in an orphanage must be to have the courage to go with just anyone. (At least his orphanage. I have since learned that not all orphanages are like Alex's, yet all are institutions and can no way replace the love and support of a family.)

Tonight I brought it up again. I told him I just wanted to understand how he truly felt and nothing he said would change about how we felt about him. I mentioned the "I would go with anyone to get out of the orphanage" conversation we had months ago and he innocently nodded. Yes, he would have gone with anyone. 

Would you have been scared to go with another family?

Yes.

But you would have went?

Yes.

Were you scared to go with us?

No.
We talked about the hosting time, about how he liked his face tickled and to lay against me. We talked about when he realized that we actually wanted to adopt him, the joy he felt.

I asked if he talked about getting adopted with his friends on the airplane ride home?

No.

Why?

Because what if they didn't have parents, (anyone that wanted to adopt them) it would hurt their feelings.

Oh.

I asked if any of the other children talked about it? The girls from his school?
No.
He said he did tell his teacher that he was going to be adopted and she told the whole class in a loud voice and then all his classmates wanted to know about his family and when we were coming. He told them about playing video games and all the food we have to eat.
He had never witnessed anyone ever being adopted from his orphanage. He knew of it, but it had not happened to anyone in his orphanage. He was the first.

We talked about when we arrived in Ukraine and  how he wouldn't go play with Dad and the other orphans. He confessed that he only wanted Dad to play with him. He didn't want to share him. Funny how I had figured that one out right there and then in the orphanage. I even blogged about his aversion to sharing his Dad.

We talked a bit more about some of his memories of the hosting program, of phone calls to the orphanage, that yes, he did cry, tears of happiness and tears of missing us. That it was hard to understand what we were saying too.

I told him about how hard and often I prayed for him and about the dream

He told me that in Ukraine he went to a class like primary (religion class) and a lady taught him that he could pray for anything and get an answer, then he told me how he prayed all night that we would come and get him. He's thinking that he and I must have been praying at the same time - that was why I had that dream!

I'd like to think that too.

So even though he would have gone with "anyone" at least he was praying for us.
It was so nice to get his take on all this.
Someday, my friends in Ukraine (and those heading there shortly) you too will get their take on this experience too. You will be able to ask, why they cried, why the hesitated, what they were thinking? Or like me you will find that they would have gone with anyone and just how sad and lonely orphan life was.
The road is rough ahead of you but so worth the journey.
God Speed.
~Wendy

Alex's last day in the orphanage....

Court Of Honor

Alex earned one of the many pins that they pin on their mothers. (What does that tell you? What a great scouting mother I am? I don't even know what this pin was for. I just know I have a whole compartment of them in my jewelry box after Austin, and now I'm getting more!) 

Note to self: Do not look down at the pin during picture taking-even though you're sure Alex is going to pin it directly to your skin. Chin up my dear! Good grief. 

 We learned that Alex's troop is going on THREE hikes this summer. Totaling ELEVEN days! Wow, what a saint-like, ambitious scout leader...right?

 Alex has been working hard on merit badges and I think he likes scouts...for the most part. They usually feed him ice cream at the end of each activity and I know he at least likes that!

Sunday Suits!

 James and Austin got new suits and I wanted to get a picture of them together in said new suits before heading to church Sunday. James wasn't ready but Austin and Devree were showing off the treats they were sneaking into sacrament meeting. I thought this was funny....Austin's little snack size compared to Devree's family size bag of Skittles. (Am I a bad mom to let them sneak treats? I just figure if it gets them to church without complaint, and they're discreet, what does it hurt? Well, besides their teeth enamel?)

James was eating his peanut butter toast and mug-o-milk and thought that would be perfectly fine to have in my new suit picture. 

 Ummm...no! So, here's me after taking away their food stuffs and trying to get them in a picturesque position.

 And after many tries here's what I got. Austin's eyes are a bit wide open and James looks real cooperative (not), but the suits look good!

 Always ready for the camera, Rylee...

 And not to be out done.....Devree!

 Sharing breakfast....

 And here's Alex even though he didn't get a new suit (he's still growing like a weed!)